Football has been the sport of choice in Audioslavia since it was first introduced by Ariddian settlers in 1938. The game grew in popularity until 1947 when the Association Football Committee of Audioslavia (AFCa) was set up to regulate the rules of the game and to create a competitve environment for the previously independent and alien teams of the further reaches of Audioslavia to play in. The AFCA Cup was set up three years later and was contested by 178 teams from across the country. These teams represented a wide variety of people and places. In addition to entrants from various towns and cities, Wallingham Police Force entered a team, as did various working mans clubs from Soundgardia, and even a team representing Lemmitanian ex-pats in Machinegrad. Generally though, most teams in the early days were short-lived, lasting only a few years before folding. The Original FAA Cup ran until 1977 when it was overhauled and replaced by the AFA (Audioslavian Football Association). The AFA ran the domestic cup competition and created eight different leagues in the eight counties of Audioslavia. These leagues usually have eight teams in the top flight, but with sometimes over 800 teams in the lower leagues. In 1983 the CFL was created. This was an eight-team league where each county (Soundgardia, Machingardia, Cornellby, Wallingh, Fenix, Caylerden, Fatherham and Ridern) is represented by a team comprised of the best players from their respective leagues. It was from these teams where the cream of the crop was taken to represent the Audioslavian national team, which played its first game in 1990.

Inception

The Audioslavian national team's first competitive match was against a team representing Lemmitania in 1990 The score ended 2-1 in favour of Lemmitania. Apart from a few one-off matches against Lemmitania and that nation's puppet, Gilmeecia, Audioslavia did not play any games against foreign opposition until 2004.

The World Cup

Audioslavia had eschewed the inaugral World Cup in Ariddia in 1990, citing it as a flash in the pan tournament that would not yield a true World Champion. This attitde was held for ten years until after TnUI '98. This tournaments commercial success, popularity and competitiveness made the World Cup tournament far too important and captivating to overlook again and, bowing to public pressure, Audioslavia agreed to enter World Cup 4, to be held in Brazillico in 2002.

World Cup 4, Brazillico, 2002

Audioslavia's first foray into international competition was successful in many ways. It drew record viewers on television, made heroes of its stars, and captivated the nation. Many were sceptical at first of Audioslavia's chances. Few knew just how the 'slaves (the new, short-hand term for Audioslavia's team) would cope against the best teams of the world, and many predicted outright embarassment. The qualifying draw however, yielded a familiar opponent in neighbours Lemmitania.

The 'slaves first match, however, would be against a team called Enelando, who were also taking part in their first world cup. The match would be held in Soundgardian National Arena, previously an athletics stadium, but redesigned to accomodate a football pitch and a few extra seats nearer to the pitch. Audioslavia took to the pitch wearing the colours of their national flag: Claret and green stripes, with black pin-stripe between the two colours. 120,000 people turned up to see the 'slaves beat Enelando by two goals to one, and the seeds of success were sown.

The 'slaves were nevertheless to find qualifying for World Cup 4 a tricky business. The win had put them in good stead, but they lost their next game and could only manage a narrow victory in the next. Game four would be an important test against old foes Lemmitania, but the lemmings would emerge 2-1 victors and leave Audioslavia in mid-table. Thankfully though, the rules stated that the top four teams in Audioslavia's seven-team group would progress, and so Audioslavia just needed four points from their next two games to avoid coming fifth and make it to Brazillico. They didn't manage the former, managing a win and a loss in their final two games and so amassing just nine points from six games, but this was still enough to progress after Dyelibeybi failed to win their final game and were placed behind Audioslavia on goal difference.

Audioslavia's qualification for Brazillic'02 was greeted with nigh on hysterical celebration back home, with its star players Chris Cornell, Tom Morello and Zack De La Rocha lionised back home. The team made the trip to Brazillico in the summer of 2002 with moderate expectations. The public were realistic of their chances, but hoped that the team would at least challenge for some of the higher places, and hoped for an upset along the way. They were not disappointed.

Audioslavia's first match was against a much fancied Kingsford side and yielded a hugely attacking and entertaining game which ended 3-3. As well as being one of the matches of the tournament, the Audioslavia-Kingsford encounter whetted the appetite for the next two games, which would see the 'slaves kick off against Jurassica and pre-tournament favourites Europa Brittania, who had reached the semi finals of the last two cups. Audioslavia's form against these two teams was emphatic, beating Jurassica 2-1 to top the group and then, on a memorable night in the Brazillican capital, dumped group favourites Europa Brittania out of the competition by holding them to a 1-1 draw which saw Audioslavia through to the second round.

The state of euphoria which engulfed the nation back home was, sadly, to last only four days as the 'slaves again came up against Lemmitania for their second round match, and were dispatched 2-1 in extra time after leading for much of the game. The 'slaves came back as heroes of football; the team that had proved to the world that Audioslavia was a force to be reckoned with. They were ranked 11th in the world, and were expected by the footballing world to go on to big things in World Cup 5.

World Cup 5, Tanah Burung, 2006

How wrong can one planet be.

Audioslavia were dismal in World Cup 5. The team was unchanged from the one that lost 2-1 to Lemmitania in the second round of World Cup 4, despite the players not playing much club football in the intervening years. The fifth of september 2004 would go down as one of the darkest days in Audioslavia's sporting history. The world's (officially) eleventh best team were mercilessly trounced 4-0 in their own back yard by a (then) unknown team by the name of Squornshelous. One Red Dot demolished the 'slaves 3-0 in game two, before the 'slaves suffered an even more embarrasing defeat to Hendland. It was to be Hendland's only ever win in international football.

With their backs to the wall, the public demanding their heads, and a hopeless cause to fight for, the 'slavian team - in fairness - went for it in the latter stages of qualifying. They defeated Halfassedstates 4-0 in a rousing encounter, before beating Caras Sidh 3-2 and Dark Outcasts by two goals to one. With one game left they needed a big win and other results to go their way to progress, but could only manage a 1-1 draw with Christofi, and bowed out of the competition before it had even begun.

The Audioslavian Football Association saw the failure to qualify as humiliating, and set about revitalising the team for the next World Cup.

to be continued..