Basil & Theo

While not in fact footballers - and two people rather than one - Basil and Theo have been added to the World Cup Hall of Fame in a single entry (following the Holy Empire's seventh participation in a World Cup in World Cup 28) for their important role as an early and influential World Cup commentary team.

Basil and Theo first graced World Cup commentary boxes in World Cup 1, and continued to fill the airwaves with their unique commentary stylings in World Cup 2 and World Cup 3. As the Holy Empire of Alasdair I Frosticus began to withdraw from contact with ordinary reality, however, their role swiftly declined. They made but a single appearance in World Cup 4 and none at all in World Cup 7 - which was the last that ordinary reality heard from the Holy Empire for some time.

While this is not universally accepted, some historians of the early history of the World Cup credit Basil and Theo with an important role in influencing early commentary styles. In particular, they pioneered the use of starting a section of commentary with a vaguely suggestive non-sequiter. Basil was particularly notorious for interrupting the match with a rambling and irrelevant anecdote. For example....

15th minute

"....two nuns, a donkey, and a plate of spaghetti!"

"I'll just interrupt that fascinating anecdote, Basil, because Juan Tzimisces has won the ball at the half way line. He passes to Ducaso...."

Those few residents of ordinary reality who remembered them - or cared - were shocked to discover that Basil and Theo were very much alive when the Holy Empire entered World Cup 25 - the nation's first appearance in the tournament since the 7th edition. Their unique style of commentary intermittently returned to the fore - as did Basil's interminable anecdotes about nuns and spaghetti - and in what was billed as their final appearance, they were evicted from Cockbill Street in the Holy Empire's final qualification match following a misunderstanding over the surreptitious appearance of Giant Zucchini legend Urk in Holy Empire colours.

Making more comebacks than your favourite comeback-prone celebrity, Basil and Theo returned again in World Cup 28 qualifying. Alas, this time it became clear that Basil had been suffering from mental illness from some time, and he had to be briefly institutionalised following an incident where - live and on-screen - he smeared his own feces over his body while attempting to provide match commentary through the medium of interpretive dance. Theo bravely soldiered on for the last couple of matches, but his heavily-sedated partner lacked his usual sparkle and wit.

What does the future hold for the Holy Empire's favourite football commentary team? Nobody knows - but it may well involve nuns, interpretive dance, and spaghetti at some point.