Cidonia

Feel Good Inc.

Cidonia

Flag of Cidonia
Motto: A lie told often enough becomes the truth
[1]
Region	Europe
Capital	Cidonia
Official Language(s)	English, German
Leader	El Cid II
Population	6.5 Billion and rising
Currency	Kreml
NS Sunset XML

The United Stalinist States of Cidonia

History

Cidonia was not called Cidonia until recently. But that is not the whole history of Cidonia, not at all. As many countries in the medieval times Karakaland (now Cidonia) was first a country in the year 1457 by the self pronounced king Yehwoh Karak.

Within his 36 year reign he had conquered many lands and improved the culture. In the year 1493 his daughter and the only queen of Karakaland, Queen Felangi, came to power. She gave women in Karakaland rights equal to those of men and there were a few female ministers in her reign. Ten years after her reign her son Yehwoh came to power. Rumors went about at the time that she was assinated by her son or at least he put in the order. Others say she was struck by a bolt of lightning. His son brought terror to the land and reigned with an iron fist. He was nicknamed "Ivan The Unbreakable", for any messenger that came to bring messages, good or bad, were killed. He had 6 marriages from which 34 children came. He died at the age of 74, having ruled the land until 1577. After that many of his sons killed each other for the rule of the country: Boris, Sergeij, Milsavik and Vladimir. After Vladimir had killed Milsavik, he ordered that only the oldest son of the new king shall rule the land; if he has no son it will be his brother's son and so on.

It was 1580 when that rule was enforced. In the year 1602 Vladimir had to fight back wild hordes of Perzians. There was little land left and many people died. The Perzians spread out to the south and north of Karakaland to widen their pest of insolence and evilness. The last barrier of defence lead by Vladimir's son Yuri successfully held 2 years. Then they struck back, reconquered their lost land and more. Even though he had more land than he could imagine, Yuri gave the former kings their land back. However, he demanded a tribute in the form of rent be paid for it. He earned lots of money which helped the country expand and grow economically. That lasted a total of 30 years until the kings demanded their land without rent. The son of Yuri, named Vladimir after Yuri's father, allowed this.

Until the year 1848, barely anything had changed. The kings changed from Arlavka to Yuri VI. In the year 1848 a philosopher and the first communist wrote together "The Communist Manifesto", which revolutionized opinions worldwide and the view of the economic situation. But this vision could not be fulfilled. In the year 1849 Karl Marx died but Friedrich Engels, his companion and "producer" if you will, continued printing issues of it and spreading the Communist belief throughout Europe.

In the year 1912, the emperor of Yermaen, King Bissmarq, declared war upon King Rasputin. The war lasted 6 years, ending in 1918. The land of Karakaland was at its end: poverty was at a european high and every day children died of hunger. The army was ruined and in debt, completely unable to repay. Then, Vladimir Cid, the father of the current Cidonian leader, El Cid, lead a revolution in Karakaland. After storming the government building without encountering any complications, he and the newly-formed Red Guard took over the parliament and the politicians working there. The royal family of Karakaland was assisinated on the same day in the same building moments afterwards. The politicians were arrested and put in jail and Vladimir Cid declared the country Communist. Royal loyalists were outnumbered and hadn't a change against the amounts of supporters of the new communist regime of Vladimir Cid.

Just a few days after the revolution, Vladimir Cid ordered the elimination of all goverment oppsition, and it was done. He ruled the country with an iron first and assured that the economy in Karakaland flourished, even though many people had to pay a price for this. Two million "opposionists" were sentenced to work in gewlags in the southern parts of Cidonia where they often worked to death. Vladimir Cid decided to rename Karakaland to a name to distinguish the new form of the nation. He named it Cidonia, as did Yehwoh Karak when he formed the country 500 years ago. Vladimir Cid ruled, until the year 1941 when the Second World War broke out. He at first had signed a pact with the aggressor nation Acme, which was broken by the same country in the year 1942. Cidonia did not hesitate and retialiated with a first unsuccessful attack on Acme. Later on in the war it relied on allies whom Acme also declared war on and crushed Acme and cut it into two pieces: North and South.

In the year 1953 North Acme forced an aggression war on Cidonia and it's allies. They, as before, did not hesitate and expelled the dictatorship in short time. The land was liberated by Cidonian and South German troops. In the year 1987 Vladimir Cid had passed away at the age of 95. Critics of the country said he was unable to rule it effectively. In the year 1991 South Acme attacked, like its brother, the countries of Cidonia and South Germany. As they had done 38 years ago, the country's government was soon expelled and the country of Sortain took a large amount of South Acme. In the year 2003 El Cid announced, together with South Germany, North Acme's independance after 50 years of occupation, even though the amount of land they recieved was only 2/3 of their country. In 2004, after the fall of the United Socialist States of Cidonia into many other states that were formerly liberated by Cidonia, El Cid died. He was followed by Chairman El Cid II, much resembling a monarchy however just taking the name of the glorious leader, El Cid II's real name is Viachislav Molotov.

In 2005 after a failed nuclear attack from the idiotic nation of Nuttylnd Cidonia pulled itself out of international politics and has of late come back to the international podium under the dictatorship of El Cid II who plans to bring the nation back to it's former glory. It is now known as the United Stalinist States of Cidonia

Government

Country name: conventional long form: The United Stalinist States of Cidonia conventional short form: Cidonia abbreviation: USSC

Government type: Dictatorship

Capital: Cid City

Independence: November 3rd 1918

National holiday: Day of the Revolution, 3rd November 1918

Suffrage: 18 years of age; Universal

Executive branch: Chief of state: Viachislav Molotov aka El Cid II

Legislative branch: Politburo, consisting of 100 peoples.

Judicial branch: People's court, 5 judges. Decisions are reached according to Cidonian law.

Political parties and leaders: Cidonian Communist Party (CCP)

CIA

Chief of the CIA: Christopher Lambert

The CIA was founded in 1952 before the second Acme war. It's Headquarters is in Kirov, north of Cid City at the coast of the Hidden Sea. It is rumoured that the CIA has engaged in foreign counter-intelligence operations including Monkecia, South Germany, Acme, Hungary, Kaurelia and other countries, it is denied.

Geography

Location: Middle-East, bordering the Hidden Sea and the Sea of Cidonia.

Land boundaries: Acme, Hungary, Kaurelia, Teutonika and Frejia.

Climate: Mild, warmer near South German border. Winters last from October to February and temperatures vary between -20 to 30 C°.

Terrain: vast eastern plain, mountains in North Acme, various rivers in the north and a slight vally in the south west.

Elevation extremes: lowest point: Cid City 21 m highest point: Mt. Novo 3,513 m

Natural resources: uranium, iron, natural gas, petroleum, timber, nickel

Land use: arable land: 5.32% other: 35.96% (2000 est.) permanent crops: 58.72%

Natural hazards: floods, earthquake activity around south near South German border (1-2 on the Richter Skala); tornadoes in the midwest and southeast; forest fires in the east.

Economy

Population: 4,212,000,000

Civil Rights: Some

Economy: Frightening

Political Freedoms: Few

Income Tax Rate: 100%

Exchange Rate: 1 Kreml = $2.01

Gross Domestic Product Per Capita: $7,920

Total National Production: $33,358,382,185,937

Private Consumption: $0

Government Budget: $36,259,111,071,670

Administration (4%): $1,334,335,287,437

Welfare (0%): $0

Healthcare (0%): $0

Education (13%): $4,336,589,684,172

Religion and Spirituality (0%): $0

Defence (34%): $11,341,849,943,218

Law and Order (13%): $4,336,589,684,172

Commerce (27%): $9,006,763,190,203

Public Transport (1%): $333,583,821,859

Environment (0%): $0

Social Equality (7%): $2,335,086,753,016

Government Waste (8%): $2,900,728,885,734

GDP - composition by sector: agriculture: 48% industry: 40% services: 12% (2002 est.) Population below poverty line: 2.7% (2001 est.)

Industries: One of the leading automobile industries; agriculture; arms manufacturing; insurance; mining industry; chemicals; electronics; food processing; lumber

Agriculture - products: wheat, corn, other grains, fruits, vegetables, cotton; beef, pork, poultry, dairy products; forest products; fish

Currency: Cidonian Kreml (K) Currency code: CIK

Military

Military branches: Red Army, Red Navy and Red Marine Corps, Air Force, and Coast Guard (Coast Guard administered in peacetime by the Department of Cidonian Security but in wartime reports to the Department of the Navy)

Military manpower - military age: 18 years of age (2003 est.)

Military manpower - availability: males age 15-49: 17,006,000 (2004 est.)

Military manpower - fit for military service: 6,120,000 Military manpower - reaching military age annually: males: 2,451,012 (2004 est.)

Demographics

Culture