First Creek Falls
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The Errindundrian capital, First Creek Falls, lies on the Southern Escarpment of the Errinundera Plateau. It is named after and located at the base, the top, around and behind the waterfall of the same name. The falls plunge 600 metres from the plateau to the southern lowlands.
Contents
Map of the Errinundera Plateau and Southern Escarpment
Description
Lower City: Downfalls
The populace resides in housetrees at the base of the falls. In order that the national animal, the long-footed potoroo, may frolic freely, it is illegal to disturb the ground in any way beneath the trees. All the trees are owned by Errinundera. People rent trees at market rates from the government and build tree-houses of any design they choose provided the tree is healthy and the house is built safely. There is a magnificent array of aerial walkways between trees that grow as high as 130 metres: mountain ash, alpine ash, shining gum, messmate and cut-tail (also known as brown barrel). The gullies below feature the most loved of all the trees - the southern sassafras - with its lime green foliage, nutmeg fragrance and Enid Blyton Toy Town shape. The seedling appears on the nation's flag.
The most sought after locations are naturally close to the falls where the constant spray allows magnificent fern and epiphyte gardens to flourish in the trees.
Upper City: The Water Quarter
An extensive but hidden elevator network has been mined in the rock behind the falls so that people can quickly and easily travel between Downfalls and Upfalls, also known as The Water Quarter. Other than shops, which can also be built in the trees, all business and administrative buildings are located on the plateau at the summit of the falls. Regulations prohibit these buildings from being visible from the tree houses.
Actually built on the river, which divides into numerous canals, the upper city, including the National Parliament, is grand with domes, arches, bridges and towers. Gondolas and small boats move back and forward between the buildings bearing people on their daily business. Closer examination of the buildings reveal they bear the scars of fire and destruction. You might say Errinundrians follow their politics very actively. The nation’s capital bears the brunt of this activism.
Bushfires
The greatest threats to this idyllic lifestyle are bush-fire and political skullduggery. On Black Friday (13 January 1939) over 6,000 perished when a crown fire raged through the house trees. This prompted the then Protector to implement the notorious "War Against Bushfirism" policy which severely curtailed human rights throughout Errinundera. Historians estimate that somewhere between 12,000 and 30,000 Errinundrians died as a direct consequence of this policy. In a backlash against this dark time in its history, the people began the great, peaceful civil disobedience campaign which culminated in that particular Protector shooting himself - the last known gun death in the country on 7 December 1941, now celebrated as Liberation Day.
On Ash Wednesday (16 February 1983) another bush-fire destroyed Upper First Creek Falls, wiping out many businesses, much to everyone's glee. This part of the city has been completely re-built since, with the marshes and creek (river really) being developed into a beautiful "water quarter" as it is affectionately called. Transport between all buildings is by gondola. Much to the embarrassment of Errinundrians the largest (and ugliest) building in the water quarter had been, until recently, headquarters of NGDV Ltd, Errinundera’s notorious woodchip export company. After Errinundera qualified for World Cup 5, happy revellers levelled the building. Read a news media account of the event: CUP SUCCESS A SETBACK FOR BUSINESS
Attitudes
Errinundrians in general, and Falls Folk (as they call themselves) in particular, know that they will never be rich but they have a smugness, that is internationally irritating, because they know they live in paradise. Along with this smugness is a tendency to ban things that are contrary to their nature. Among banned items are meat, cars, cigarettes, guns, police and armed forces. Crime, however, is a problem. And as no NationState has yet developed the necessary technology there are no fears that Errinundera will be invaded.
Visitors to Errinundera are warned that no dead animal products are allowed into the country. This prohibition includes leather and meat. Local businesses can provide visitors with the finest quality gear made from a microfibre that is indistinguishable from leather. Those who are unsure about a vegetarian diet should consult their dieticians or avail themselves of advice from the free health service upon arrival.
Errinundrians may have banned many pernicious things but generally speaking they are egalitarian to a fault. Few people lock their house-trees. Besides, not being terribly materialistic, they have very little worth stealing. Few Errinundrians have a television, let alone a home entertainment centre. Errinundrians have placed thousands of huge screens in public places where they can watch football matches in a community carnival atmosphere. Visitors can feel free to hop up on anyone’s home for a chat. Don’t be alarmed if you see naked people among the treetops – it’s just the way they are. Errinundrians are also fairly relaxed about sex.
News Media
- Local broadsheet: First Creek Falls Age
- Local tabloid: Falls City News
- National newspaper: Errinundrian Financial Review
Notable Falls Folk
- filthyl - politician who was Protector of the Common Wealth and later Protector of Sports; coach of the national team in World Cup 5.
- fionar - politician who was at one stage leader of the nation; coach of the national team from World Cup 6 through to World Cup 9.
- gabriellen - scientist and football star.
Football Ground
The home ground of the FCFFC is the National Downfall Stadium situated lower down the southern escarpment from the city. It is notable for Hairy Man Falls that dominates one end of the pitch and for the view from the other of the Errinundera River valley.
