Humorless Squirrels
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| Flag of Humorless Squirrels | |
| Motto: "That's not funny, and that Report is due today." | |
| No Map Available Yet | |
| Region | The Cuckoos Egg |
|---|---|
| Capital | CEO's Office |
| Official Language(s) | Seriously |
| Leader | Too Many To Mention |
| Population | 6 Million |
| Currency | Memo |
| NS Sunset XML | |
The Incorporated States of Humorless Squirrels
This small, 23-Story nation was once a small, 23-story business. It has since become a country, after a sub-clause on an old document was examined, revealing the company's right to declare independance from the country it was located in. After they did so, the mother country, the First National Bank of Walkandtalkalot, declared war on Humorless Squirrels - which was called UnomonoCorp at the time - and lost after a year-long seige of the building, which was broken by a joint effort by UnomonoCorp's Elite Sales Division, and the 1st and 2nd Delivery Squadrons. After the seige was broken, UnomonoCorp ordered a full-scale invasion of Walkandtalkalot, employing such unorthodox troops as door-to-door salesmen and stock-brokers to storm enemy positions and weaken their lines. After a year or two of unrelenting war, Walkandtalkalot sued for peace, and signed a peace treaty.
The treaty recognized UnomonoCorp as an independant country, and also gave them land around their building, including the Parking Lot, the Garrage, a phone booth and a Bus Stop. As a result of their victory, the people of UnomonoCorp drew up a constitution and renamed their country.
The Government of Humorless Squirrels
While it is best not to enquire about the government of Humorless Squirrels, many do, and are either escorted out of the country, or find themselves reading through file cabinets filled with legal documents. However, as some have gotten past the paper-work, it is said that after the constitution was written, and a democratic system had been implemented, that the people found out that a subclause had been left out, and that once elected, a president never stopped being a president. Currently, there are 23 presidents in office, 9 of them are still alive. The rest of them have been mummified and are wheeled into board meeting in wheelchairs.
The Demise of Humorless Squirrels
Due to the nature of Humorless Squirrels' government, culture, and laws, the country was easily toppled. During a war with a much larger country, which the company was winning, Rathmore Incorporated, a large firm, bought the country out, ending the countries short reign. The Building and the parking garage were later demolished due to building permit disputes, and the parking lot was dug up to make way for a swimming pool. The Bus stop is still there, although the phone booth was replaced by a small delicatessan.
