Paulo Bachchan
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'Thug of the Season'? In the case of Paulo Bachchan, try 'Thug of the Nation'. Paulo is, arguably, the most 'positive' Football player to ever come out of Starblaydia, Paulo broke most records for getting Red and Yellow cards, as well as fines for foul language and ungentlemanly behaviour.
He never let off his aggression throughout his career, as demonstrated during the Liverpool England-hosted Second Four Nations Invitational. After a 2-1 defeat to Lethislavania on Matchday 5, Paulo was sentenced to 6 months in jail for aggravated assault on an irate Starblaydi fan. Thankfully, young Dimitrios Steliopolous was available in the FNI2 squad to be an ample replacement.
After a varied career at Jhanna City, Paulo moved to the up-and-coming nation of Spruitland to see out his playing career at Lepus FC. After swearing at and assaulting many players, staff and officials in Spruitland, he was a firm fans' favourite and soon moved into a coaching position.
"At least it puts me closer to the fourth official than usual," he said, "gotta save the old legs, after all."
Paulo's management of Lepus soon paid off as they triumphed over Fabricio de Souza Lima's FC Albertine to take the Spruitland First Division title in Season 4. Ironically, Bachchan had to celebrate his team’s victory in a Sativa prison. After Lepus’ 2-2 against Sativa on Saturday night, Bachchan had taken out his frustration on the referee, putting the man in the hospital with a broken jaw and earning himself another aggravated assault charge. He was still awaiting the parole hearing when Albertine lost the next day, but that didn’t put a dampner on his joy.
"All team go visit coach in jail," Lepus forward Taki Sala said afterwards, "lots and lots of drunk and fun! We sing Jailhouse Rock all night!"
Winning the First Division title must significantly ease that pain at His Majesty's pleasure. Both the championship title as the aggravated assault only increased Bachchan’s hero-status in the Lepus area, though the latter may have cost him the Manager of the Season award – completely unjustified, Lepus supporters said. For his certain managerial 'style', Paulo was given the job of managing the Spruitland Bunnies, Spruitland's Under-21 World Cup side for U21WC17, where they finished in 4th place. He took full-time control of the Bunnies, handing control of Lepus FC to the more-conventional Rigoberto.
After U21WC18, Spruitland emerged victorious with the Under-21 World Cup and Paulo was given the Spruitland's highest honour - the Honorary Rabbit, the first non-Spruitlander to earn such an award. However, he got fed up with waiting for Under-21 World Cup 20 to start and went back to his home country, violating his parole. He was replaced as Bunnies Manager by Frederic Juneau.
His thuggish behaviour was succeeded by Francisco Ibanez, who cites Bachchan as his hero and mentor.
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Starblaydia squad - World Cup 18 Qualifiers |
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1 Da Silva | 2 Salisbury | 3 Nicholson | 4 R. Di Bradini | 5 Durand | 6 Carter | 7 Stark | 8 Naoki | 9 Hall | 10 S. Di Bradini (c) | 11 Hawthorne | 12 Cragg | 13 Palmer | 14 Bachchan | 15 Mikael Tissot | 16 Scott | 17 Berisha | 18 Ol-wairain | 19 Thornley | 20 Robertson | 21 Martin | 22 Montefalcon | 23 Jakkinho | Coach: N'Dumbu-Nsungu | ||
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Starblaydia squad - World Cup 19 Qualifiers |
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1 Cragg | 2 R. Di Bradini | 3 Azanulbizarn | 4 Montefalcon | 5 Durand (c) | 6 Piper | 7 Evans | 8 Naoki | 9 Hall | 10 Jakkinho | 11 Tirado | 12 Thornley | 13 Majeed | 14 Bachchan | 15 Doukas | 16 N. Matranga | 17 Del Blanco | 18 Matis | 19 De Marco | 20 Nicholson | 21 Scott | 22 Berisha | 23 S. Di Bradini | Coach: N'Dumbu-Nsungu | ||
