Pigoutathon
Pigoutathon
Pigoutathon is an unremarkable film about a Professor of Calisthenics, Jimmy Joggins, who bets his friend, Colin Pickernose, that he can take a chip-eating woman of massive proportions and make her quite fit. It's plot is quite clearly copied from that of the infamous musical, My Fat Lardy.
Joggins tries putting the heroine, Edna Eateverything, on a treadmill. At first, she manages quite well, but, when he increases the speed, she flies off, knocks over all the other people in the gym and puts a hole in the wall. Next, he takes her to a supermarket, to show her what foods she should be eating, but is distracted by a "Special Offer" sign in the "Free from" section and leaves her unattended, for a few seconds. When he returns, he finds that she has eaten a whole aisle of confectionery and that her face is covered in chocolate.
In desperation, he binds her in chains and imprisons her in a specially constructed concrete sauna, in his back garden. After five days in the steam, she has lost more than 4 kg and now weighs a mere 370 kg. Unfortunately, the combined weight of Edna and the sauna has caused major subsidence to Joggins's house. Having written a pack of lies on the insurance claim form, he leaves his wife to sort out the mess and runs off with Eateverything. Well, I say "run" but, obviously, that's just a figure of speech.
They turn up (although it is never explained how they get there) at the home of one of Joggins's friends, Simon Slushfund. Slushfund, a leading Blubberologist, is willing to help re-shape Eateverything but asks for 150,000 Pcnls. Joggins empites out his pockets but, when it is obvious that he doesn't have the money, he shows Slushfund a secret file, containing details of Slushfund's payments from the Grossman-La Rogue drug company.
Slushfund had been carrying out experiments on overweight medical students, using Rogue Pharmaceuticals' drugs. The drugs had caused extreme side effects. In one case, a volunteer had expressed a desire to become a primary school teacher in Africa and, in another, the student had taken an unpaid job at an old people's home, sold her flash sportscar and started to go to work on a second-hand bicycle.
Rogue knew that, if this got out, middle-class professionals would never risk using their products. In return for being handsomely rewarded with lots of very beautiful money, Slushfund agrees not to mention the side effects, in any of his reports. Faced with the prospect of being exposed, Slushfund agrees to carry out the work for free. The hipposuction takes 92 hours and Slushfund loses seven litres in sweat but, at last, Eateverything is reduced to a normal size. Joggins hypnotises her, so that she'll reject unhealthy food and, to be on the safe side, offers her half the money, which Pickernose is going to pay him. Pickernose pays up, the insurance money comes through and Edna can afford to buy some deodorant.
The plot of My Fat Lardy, from which the story was taken, is identical- except for the bits about the treadmill, the supermarket, the cosmetic surgery and the sauna.
