Repeal "Fossil Fuel Reduction Act"

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The fourth "instant repeal" in the UN's history was also the first unsuccessful one. The repeal effort for the Fossil Fuel Reduction Act grew out of strong opposition to the legislation on the part of established UN forum regulars.

Resolution History

Though the Fossil Fuel Reduction Act was seen by some as a sensible alternative to the catastrophic (and repealed) Promotion of Solar Panels, Omigodtheykilledkenny, sponsor of the spectacular failure that was the first Repeal "Protection of Dolphins Act," did not view a 45-year mandate to reduce fossil fuel consumption by 90 percent much more favorably than it did a 10-year mandate to reduce consumption by 100 percent, and thus strongly opposed the FFRA when it was at vote in the General Assembly. The Federal Republic's opposition included President Manuelo Fernanda screaming at the Ateelatayan ambassador via a UN diplomat's cell phone (which was held aloft in the assembly chamber) [1]; a lamebrained suggestion from the Omigodtheykilledkenny ambassador that his nation simply increase its fossil-fuel output by 1,000 percent before the act went into effect [2]; and a telegram campaign, which managed to convince dozens of delegates initially in support of the FFRA either to withdraw or switch their votes. Other nations telegrammed against the proposal of their own volition.

The efforts were all in vain, however, as the FFRA passed by a 65%-35% margin. The Fernanda Administration soon realized that its Creative UN Solutions Agency's efforts to save its own nation from the arguably devastating impacts of the FFRA would not help out the many smaller, developing UN nations, which, the Federal Republic argued, would suffer disproportionately under the act and take a hit to their economies. This did not sit well with the Federal Republic -- which feared that the trade agreements it had with many smaller (and especially petroleum-producing) UN nations would falter as a result. "We'll have to invade these nations, revive their oil industries and run their economies for them!" intoned a warmongering, mob-connected Defense Secretary Charlie Valentine, in a disturbingly eager voice. The State Department, however, thought it more practical -- and much cheaper -- simply to sponsor a repeal at the UN.

Proposal Campaign

The repeal met an enthusiastic reception from the National Sovereignty Organization and many members of the United Nations Old Guard, and hit quorum within a day of its submittal, garnering about 230 delegate approvals before it went to the General Assembly for vote.

UN Debate

Though some sensible opposition to the repeal was voiced during the floor debate, the topic drew little interest, as it was the fourth fossil-fuel-related topic in just two months. Some of the arguments heard during the debate were truly perplexing: for example, the UN should not repeal an act because it "probably should not have been approved in the first place" [3], and "I dispute the use of statistics merely to prove your point" [4]. At least one nation opposed the FFRA repeal because it was still "a bit miffed" over the UN's recent passage of Repeal "Protection of Dolphins Act."

Cluichstan (DEATed) and Gruenberg, both active NSO members, telegrammed in favor of the repeal during the floor vote, and saw modest success. At the behest of the repeal's author, Pacific delegate Mammothistan switched its nearly 300 votes in favor of repeal. Also in favor were Gatesville and the Rejected Realms. The West Pacific, which was expected to vote in favor, was suddenly hit with an unexpected delegate transition during the vote and could not participate. Both North and South Pacifics voted against. An NSO member credited a lack of practicality and pragmatism on the part of many idealistic young liberal UN nations with the repeal's ultimate defeat.

In the end, Omigodtheykilledkenny Ambassador Jack Riley, inspired by a South Pacific nation's characterization of "newest trend" of instant repeals as "Vote it in, vote it out," disco-danced for the assembly.

Resolution Text

Repeal "Fossil Fuel Reduction Act"
A proposal to repeal a previously passed resolution

Category: Repeal Resolution: #126 Proposed By: Omigodtheykilledkenny

Description: UN Resolution #126: Fossil Fuel Reduction Act (Category: Environmental; Industry Affected: All Businesses) shall be struck out and rendered null and void.

Argument: UNDERSTANDING the need for effective legislation to promote clean and renewable energy alternatives and accelerate their development;

EMPHASIZING that such legislation should be sensitive to economic factors and circumstances, especially where small and developing nations are concerned;

ACKNOWLEDGING that Resolution #126: Fossil Fuel Reduction Act fails on this point;

RECOGNIZING that a mandate for a 2-percent annual reduction in fossil-fuel emissions based on a flat “ceiling consumption rate” does not take into account the rapid growth of nations over time, and thus requires nations to cut emissions by much more than 2 percent each year;

REGRETTING that small and developing nations will be forced to bear the brunt of this mandate and withstand the most damage to their national economies, as their populations grow at a relatively faster rate, and they may not yet be equipped with the resources necessary for such a dramatic shift in energy supply;

CONCERNED that the “time extensions” authorized under this act cover only catastrophic circumstances (specifically natural disasters, war and “severe economic depression”) and may not allow nations to apply for extensions based on less severe economic or political conditions, such as domestic political turmoil, recessions or significant economic strain; and

TROUBLED by this act’s authorization of trade sanctions on noncompliant nations, which would force some governments to take drastic measures -- including imposing hefty new taxes on businesses and private citizens, placing severe new restrictions on private enterprise, and even seizing businesses and shutting down their factories if nationwide emission rates are not decelerating fast enough -- in order to come into compliance on schedule and avoid punitive sanctions,

The United Nations hereby REPEALS Resolution #126: Fossil Fuel Reduction Act.

Votes For: 5,386
Votes Against: 8,232
Defeated: Fri Nov 4 2005

Gameplay Impacts

This resolution would have had no significant impact on the way NationStates is played.

Forum Poll

In an attempt to answer the immortal question "Do UN forum users have a life?", forumgoers were asked, "Grazin' in the grass is a gas, baby, can you dig it?" The Texan Hotrodders ambassador was among the first to raise concern over the truly disturbing poll results, which revealed that an astonishing 17 percent of the polled UN nations were poised to invade Chechnya if the repeal passed; 10 percent of the ambassadors thought they were still talking about dolphins; 17 percent were sleeping on the job; and 6 percent had cursed the Federal Republic with their otters.

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The Federal Republic later asked the UN Secretariat to invalidate the official UN vote on the grounds of the ambassadors' sheer ineptness as illustrated in the forum poll. However, one moderator was snoozing, another had invaded Chechnya and still another had gone swimming with the dolphins. So the vote stood.

As to whether the forum poll results were fairly representative of the official UN vote, it don't take no genius to figure out that they don't compare at all. However, it could be argued that options 2, 5, 6 and 8 in the forum poll count as "no" votes, option 1 counts as a "yes" vote, and options 4 and 7 count as abstentions; therefore, the forum poll shows that 48 percent were opposed to the repeal, 13 percent were in favor, 30 percent had abstained, and 10 percent remained opposed to the dolphins-act repeal. The official UN vote, meanwhile, went 60%-40% against.

Any geek who actually tries to analyze those numbers will be wedgied to the fullest extent of the law.

Additional Materials

Omigodtheykilledkenny and the United Nations
Administration and Policies: Department of State | Mission to the United Nations | Voting Record | Creative Solutions Agency | Kennypoll
Mission Staff: Susa Batko-Yovino | Jenny Chiang | Sammy Faisano | Alex Tehrani | Jessie McArthur | George Brown | Jack Riley | Surly the Repealinator
Sponsored Legislation: Repeal "Protection of Dolphins Act" | Repeal "Fossil Fuel Reduction Act" | Repeal "Gay Rights" | Abortion Legality Convention | Unconventional Arms Accord | Prohibition of UN Military | Repeal "Mutual Recognition of Borders" | Accessible Family Planning | Repeal "SPCC Regulation Act" | Repeal "Max Barry Day"