Simooooo

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Simooooo
simflag.jpg
Flag of Simooooo
Motto: Bovine of all countries, unite!
map
Region England
Capital Bovinia
Official Language(s) Bovine
Leader The Lord of the Cows
Population ~4 billion
Currency The Hoof 
NS Sunset XML

Overview

Politics

The Island of Simooooo is unique in that it is run by cows. Bovine stock overthrew their human oppressors years ago and have led a fruitful government ever since. The government is run by the Lord of the Cows and his aides, all of which are bulls and cows.

Humans are still viewed with some suspicion and only recently have discussions been opened with the neighbouring nations.

Geography

The island is dominated by a central mountain named Mount Lush Grass. It is here where the throne of Simooooo lies and where the Council meet to decide upon issues brought by the citizenry. The capital, on the west coast, is by far the largest settlement followed by Port Calf which lies on the south eastern tip of the island. Mosscow is a relitively small town on the south coast.

Economy

The economy is dominated by beef-based agriculture which is virtually the sole industry of the nation. This acts as a sort of food come funeral business whereby elderly cows sacrifice themselves to the 'economy' and then the products are entirely exported overseas. The nationalised company, Simooooo Beef Exports (SBE) handles all the nation's exports to the neighbouring nations.

Provinces

There are four main gubernias (provinces) on island, each dominated by a one of the larger settlements:

  • Greater Bovina
  • Calf
  • Mosscovvy
  • Lush Grass
  • Kesha

Greater Bovinia

This is area surrounding and including the capital of Simooooo. The province covers the entire central section of the island and stretches to both coasts. Bovinia is by far the largest settlement on the island and practically all government business is conducted here. Other features of the city include 'The Raging Bull', the ever-popular public house and also the headquarters of Simooooo Beef Exports who operate out of the large port.

Calf

Calf is a small province situated in the south-east of Simooooo. It is mostly an industrial sector used by the national beef exports company to access the seas to the east of the island. Due to the company's impressive growth, the settlement has expanded and came to be known simply as Port Calf.

Mosscovvy

In the south-west lies the peaceful province of Mosscovvy. It is made up of almost entirely farmland to feed the large vegetarian population. All the bovine that live in the region are collective farmers and as such, there is no major settlement in the region.

Lush Grass

To the north of the island lies the province of Lush Grass which is dominated by the aptly named, Mount Lush Grass. This region is an unnoffical national park of sorts as the are very few settlements, perhaps due to the fact that The Lord of the Cows makes his offical residence at the summit of the mountain, although he in fact spends a majority of his time in Bovinia deeling with government matters.

Kesha

Kesha is situated to the west of the island and is very much a different place to the rest of Simooooo. This region was given to the Great Pandas that arrived in 1988CE (see history) and operates in an almost autonomous manner. The population of Kesha is rather small but it remains fiercely independent from the central government.

History

52 BCE

The House of Fortitude rises to power on the Island of Inferiority. This occurred through a military uprising of such ferocity that over a quarter of the island's inhabitants perished on the blades of the savage rebels. Towns were razed, hundreds were put into slavery yet this vicious movement had the popular support of the people of Inferiority, due to the oppressive monarchy that preceded it. The House of Fortitude set up a dictatorial style government or sorts that granted civil freedoms that were only dreamed about previously. The young Henry Fortitude became the first Imperator of Inferiority.

3 CE

Henry Fortitude dies of old age and his only son, William takes the throne. His reign starts out similar to that of his late father's but after a few years; it began to become riddled with corruption due to his greed and ultimately, his paranoia. A series of laws were introduced that destroyed the civil liberties that his father strove for. William proceeded to confiscate almost all of the arable land and many of the riches from the wealthy and the church. William the Ironfist, as he became known, thus begun his harsh rule that, through his descendants, would last for several centuries.

1639 CE

The Island of Inferiority has seen sixteen centuries of rule by the House of Fortitude and, while still suffering the same degree of oppression, the land has prospered. In the last century alone, under the guiding hand of Imperator Arthur III, the economy has expanded in leaps and bounds due to the ludicrous, beef-based agriculture business. This in turn, has caused a significant increase in the standard of living. Also in this year, the first ships returned from Inferiority's neighbour to the east, namely the land now called Resine. These economic and diplomatic advances have seen the island transformed into a minor power on the map of England.

1684 CE

A religious uprising occurred in this year due to a prophet named Bill the Mad. He claimed the right to the throne of Inferiority and said if he was not proclaimed Imperator then the current ruler, Henry VI would instantly die. The allotted time passed and incidentally, Henry, aged 64, suffered a major heart attack which caused his sudden death. This sparked popular support for Bill the Mad, who began amassing a militia to help his coup. The government fell, but Bill was only able to briefly maintain his ideal of a strict, devout leadership for a matter of weeks before the island descended into chaos. A state of Martial Law was unofficially declared and over the next few centuries, all that was made under the leadership of the House of Fortitude was slowly destroyed.

1917 CE

A Friesian bull who went only by the name of the Lord of the Cows came forth from the forests that surround the modern town of Mosscow (formerly Moocow). He and his tribe are the first species, besides humans, to have developed conscious intelligence. His tribe was created after several cows were lost from the plantations of Mosscow during William the Ironfist's rules and over the centuries, they developed a large and complex tribal society in the vast wooded plains in the south of the island. The Lord of the Cows spoke fluent English (with a pompous accent if anything) and began to preach to other bovine animals about the true glory of being free from the oppressive hand of the humans. Due to the once thriving beef-based agriculture market, there were thousands of cows across the land that eagerly took up the torch and spread the word of bovine freedom. Hatred of the Homo-sapiens grew in the bovine world and it was not long before such chants as "Four legs good, two legs bad!" were heard in every farm across the land.

Soon a huge uprising of cows, bulls, calves and assorted other animals were marching on the seat of government, or what was left of it, which traditionally sits atop Mount Lush Grass. The remnants of Bill the Mad's followers and other militia put up minimal resistance against the larger forces, and arguably more superior, of the bovine-led army. The ancient throne was taken with no blood spilled in what must be one of the most peaceful revolutions in history. A new government was created, the island was renamed Simooooo after the age old bovine victory call and the capital was renamed Bovinia. Perhaps more importantly, the largest tavern was renamed "The Raging Bull".

A momentous event had occurred in world history, a nation state was under the control of not humans, but cows. Soon after the Lord of the Cows took the throne, a warrant was issued that required all humans to leave the island before sunrise or face captivity. The exiles sailed from every corner of Simooooo to take refuge in the neighbouring lands of Resine, Britains Empire, Youngtung and Elise. One bard, who reached the distant Land of Glory, wrote the popular song "Cows with Guns" which is a fictitious tale of what became known as the February Revolution.

1988 CE

In this year there was a major break in the generally xenophobic attitudes of Simooooo's inhabitants. Before then, many cows were becoming more and more elitist, not allowing humans to enter the island and even viewing other animals as inferior. More and more immigration applications from animals of other lands were being denied. This changed however, when the government received a distress telegram from a tribe of Giant Pandas who requested asylum in Simooooo. They came from a distant land in the Far East but under the leadership of Kesha the Bold, they had risen up against the harsh regimes of their home land. Simooooo's government was sympathetic to Kesha's cause but was doubtful the citizenry would be. Therefore, Kesha and his tribe were granted asylum on the grounds that the similarities between a cow and a panda's colouring was too similar to be a coincidence.

Present Day

Simooooo is still firmly under bovine control. The government consists of the Lord of the Cows and other elders making the decisions, although more democratic reforms are pending. All animals enjoy extensive civil rights and an average standard of living. The economy was in taters before the February Revolution due to 233 years of near Martial Law but during the bovine rule, it has seen phenomenal progress which is led by the booming beef-based agriculture business. This may sound strange but it acts more as a funeral service. The Beef Guild requires all recently deceased cows to be taken to the nearest guild house where upon the meat is prepared and sold abroad.

The tribe of Giant Pandas now have their own town west of Bovinia named after their late elder, Kesha. They have adapted well to their new found freedoms and the alpha male, Big-Big has even begun to participate in Simooooo's government.

Huge steps have been made diplomatically but this has only occurred in the passed decade or so due to the continued xenophobic attitudes views of most cows. However, with the more open minded younger generation, humans were permitted to come to the island to set up official embassies in Bovinia. There are embassies many present now, although they have to be heavily guarded from extreme right-wing groups who still harbour great hatred for all Homo-sapiens. Nevertheless, Simooooo is now a United Nations member state after a surprising result in a referendum about it just a few years ago. The island also has successful trading ties with many of its neighbours. This is mostly due to how startlingly apt more cows are at sailing, allowing Simooooo to possess an extensive merchant navy.

Simooooo and its bovine leadership is now being more and more accepted by the wider international community. With the near completion of the Bovine Genome project it seems to most people that perhaps humans are not the most dominant species after all.


NationStates work

Brief Chronology

Late 2003 - Simooooo is founded and joins England.

January 2004 - Becomes Minister of the Interior in England.

March 2004 - Awarded the 'Northern Ireland Cross' for help in the defence of Northern Ireland.

May 2004 - Creates the Civil Service in England so that the citizenry may help the government in workings of the region. Awarded a second 'Northern Ireland Cross' for help in the defence of Northern Ireland against invasion.

July 2004 - Awarded the 'Ministry of Defence Service Star' for help in the libertion of The North Pacific during this month. Becomes a citizen of the Allied States of EuroIslanders.

August 2004 - Becomes House Representative in the Alliance Defence Network.

December 2004 - Becomes Minister of Foreign Affairs in England. Becomes a Democractic Committee member in the ASE.

January 2005 - Founds the Allied British Isles alliance. This is a pan-British and Irish treaty organisation that concern is the defence of British and Irish regions.

April 2005 - Closed the Allied British Isles alliance due to internal conflict. Becomes an active member of the Red Liberty Alliance.

June 2005 - Completed negotiations of theThe London Accord, an alliance between England and the USK. Also completed negotiations of the England - The Proletariat Coalition Alliance. Awarded 'The North Pacific Campaign Ribbon' for helping with the liberation of The North Pacific, 'The Ministry of Defence Service Medal' for long service in England's Protectorate and 'The St George's Cross' for outstanding, long-lasting service to the Ministry of Defence.

Miscellaneous

Simooooo has been in the English government for more than 18 months and with this has come great experience and knowledge of England and her affairs. Having personally initiated and maintain relations with over ten different regions, formed several alliances and participated in numerous liberations and defence operations with England, the ADN and the RLA, it can be said that Simooooo has had experience in a huge variety of fields and affairs in the NationStates world.