Difference between revisions of "UN Headquarters"

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<!--:'''''NOTE:''' These "official" listings assume [[RP]] recognition of [[UN Building Mgmt]]. Please do not add your own nation's office listing unless you have confirmed such arrangements by telegramming [http://www.nationstates.net/un_building_mgmt its offices]. Please bear in mind that they are a bureaucracy and it may take a while to recieve a response.  Also, sending multiple telegrams doesn't help.  Thank you.''-->
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<!--PLEASE **DO NOT** ADD YOUR NATION'S OFFICE UNLESS YOU HAVE TELEGRAMMED THE NATION 'UN BUILDING MGMT' OR HAVE HAD YOUR OFFICE CONFIRMED BY THEM ON THE UN FORUM. THANK YOU.-->
  
{{Image|http://junkyarddog.blogs.com/photos/michael_mccormick_visits_/big_bank_building_ub.jpg|right|Trein|The UN Building}}
+
[[Image:Building.jpg|frame|right|The UN Building, a grotesque, mismatched nightmare of architectural design. To shore up funding (something the UN distinctly lacks), [[UN Building Mgmt]] has had to lease out ad space near the ground level.]]
 +
'''The UN Headquarters''' -- a massive complex comprising a 40-story building; substantial basement digs; a bar full of drunken diplomats; a saloon for filthy [[National Sovereignty Organization#Membership|sovereigntist]] [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=10080359&postcount=19 outlaws]; an underground [[UN DEFCON|bunker]] where concerned [[nations]] secretly devise international-security schemes; and a dank, cobweb-filled [[United Nations Old Guard|dungeon]] where shadowy figures supposedly plot the [[United Nations|UN]]'s every move -- is reserved for conducting business pertaining to the [[NationStates]] [[United Nations]]. It occupies a secure, undisclosed location (though some say it sits in [[Sovereign UN Territory]]), where incidents involving militarized penguins, foul-mouthed [[Antarctic Oasis#Native Sentients|naval dolphins]], [[Cluichstan|Cluichstani]] "servicewomen," [[Omigodtheykilledkenny#Kenny Armed Forces|Stripper Commandos]], mysterious robed otaku, robot destructor bunnies, sacred goats, scummy [[Compliance Ministry]] gnomes, anti-UN gnomes (employed by the [[Omigodtheykilledkenny|OMGTKK]] delegation), a talking cat, diplomatic [[dwarves]] and other odd sapient beings, an ambiguously gay barkeep, a [[Pierre-Jean Delormebleu|strange man]] handing round marzipan babies and a flatulent dragon going by the name Gurgle -- are common. Many UN [[List of Ambassadors to the United Nations|ambassadors]] have permanent offices here, though many delegations have had to hire on substantial security staff as much of the complex has been deemed unsafe: mutants and other bizarre creatures are fabled to have overrun large portions of the building's underground real-estate, as well as the floors formerly occupied by [[Enn]] and [[DemonLordEnigma]]. In addition, packs of overzealous office-stealers constantly prowl the halls, poised to bagsy a departing [[UN Member|member]]'s office and/or office supplies at a moment's notice. The facilities are managed by a vast bureaucracy aptly named the [[UN Building Mgmt]], the staff of which tirelessly and thanklessly sees to mountains of paperwork, maintenance, cleaning and divvying out much-demanded office space. Most UN business is conducted on the [[UN Forum]] or in the enormous, multi-story [[General Assembly]] chamber, though other affairs are negotiated in various committee rooms, meeting rooms for the UN's resident think-tanks, and the [[Strangers' Bar]] -- envoys often pulling cards from the [[UN Cards|UN Deck]] to state their government's position on issues that come before the international body.
  
'''The UN Headquarters''' -- a massive complex registered on the [[World Heritage List]], comprising a 40-story building; substantial basement digs; a bar full of drunken diplomats; a saloon for filthy [[National Sovereignty Organization#Membership|sovereigntist]] [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=10080359&postcount=19 outlaws]; an underground [[UN DEFCON|bunker]] where concerned [[nations]] secretly devise international-security schemes; and a dank, cobweb-filled [[United Nations Old Guard|dungeon]] where shadowy figures supposedly plot the [[United Nations|UN]]'s every move -- is reserved for conducting business pertaining to the [[NationStates]] [[United Nations]]. It occupies a secure, undisclosed location somewhere in the NationStates [[multiverse]], and incidents involving militarized penguins, foul-mouthed [[Antarctic Oasis#Native Sentients|naval dolphins]], [[Cluichstan|Cluichstani]] "servicewomen," [[Omigodtheykilledkenny#Kenny Armed Forces|Stripper Commandos]], mysterious robed otaku, robot destructor bunnies, sacred goats, scummy [[Compliance Ministry]] gnomes, anti-UN gnomes (employed by the [[Omigodtheykilledkenny|OMGTKK]] delegation), a talking cat, diplomatic [[dwarves]] and other odd sapient beings, an ambiguously gay barkeep, and a flatulent dragon going by the name Gurgle -- are common. Many UN [[List of Ambassadors to the United Nations|ambassadors]] have permanent offices here, though many delegations have hired on substantial security staff, as much of the complex has been deemed unsafe: mutants and other bizarre creatures are fabled to have overrun large portions of the building's underground real-estate, as well as the floors formerly occupied by [[Enn]] and [[DemonLordEnigma]]. In addition, packs of overzealous office-stealers constantly prowl the halls, poised to bagsy a departing [[UN Member|member]]'s office and/or office supplies at a moment's notice. The facilities are managed by a vast bureaucracy aptly named the [[UN Building Mgmt]], the staff of which tirelessly and thanklessly sees to mountains of paperwork, maintenance, cleaning and divying out much-demanded office space. Most UN business is conducted on the [[UN Forum]] or in the enormous, multi-story [[General Assembly]] chamber, though other affairs are negotiated in various committee rooms, meeting rooms for the UN's resident think-tanks, and the [[Strangers' Bar]] -- envoys often pulling cards from the [[UN Cards|UN Deck]] to state their government's position on issues that come before the international body.
+
==Floor Index==
 
+
A listing of the attributes of each floor of the UN building is listed below.
+
==Floors==
+
 
<div border="0" id="toc" style="margin: 0 auto; width:100%; clear:both;">
 
<div border="0" id="toc" style="margin: 0 auto; width:100%; clear:both;">
 
'''Floor Index:''' [[#B-8|B-8]] [[#B-7|B-7]] [[#B-6|B-6]] [[#B-5|B-5]] [[#B-4|B-4]] [[#B-3|B-3]] [[#B-2|B-2]] [[#B-1|B-1]] [[#Ground Floor|L]] [[#1st|1]] [[#2nd|2]] [[#3rd|3]] [[#4th|4]] [[#5th|5]] [[#6th|6]] [[#7th|7]] [[#8th|8]] [[#9th|9]] [[#10th|10]] [[#11th|11]] [[#12th|12]] [[#13th|13]] [[#14th|14]] [[#15th|15]] [[#16th|16]] [[#17th|17]] [[#18th|18]] [[#19th|19]] [[#20th|20]] [[#21st|21]] [[#22nd|22]] [[#23rd|23]] [[#24th|24]] [[#25th|25]] [[#26th|26]] [[#27th|27]] [[#28th|28]] [[#29th|29]] [[#30th|30]] [[#31st|31]] [[#32nd|32]] [[#33rd|33]] [[#34th|34]] [[#35th|35]] [[#36th|36]] [[#37th|37]] [[#38th|38]] [[#39th|39]] [[#40th|40]] [[#Roof|R]] [[#Hovering Vulnerably 69 & 3/4 stories above the roof|69+3/4]] __NOTOC__  
 
'''Floor Index:''' [[#B-8|B-8]] [[#B-7|B-7]] [[#B-6|B-6]] [[#B-5|B-5]] [[#B-4|B-4]] [[#B-3|B-3]] [[#B-2|B-2]] [[#B-1|B-1]] [[#Ground Floor|L]] [[#1st|1]] [[#2nd|2]] [[#3rd|3]] [[#4th|4]] [[#5th|5]] [[#6th|6]] [[#7th|7]] [[#8th|8]] [[#9th|9]] [[#10th|10]] [[#11th|11]] [[#12th|12]] [[#13th|13]] [[#14th|14]] [[#15th|15]] [[#16th|16]] [[#17th|17]] [[#18th|18]] [[#19th|19]] [[#20th|20]] [[#21st|21]] [[#22nd|22]] [[#23rd|23]] [[#24th|24]] [[#25th|25]] [[#26th|26]] [[#27th|27]] [[#28th|28]] [[#29th|29]] [[#30th|30]] [[#31st|31]] [[#32nd|32]] [[#33rd|33]] [[#34th|34]] [[#35th|35]] [[#36th|36]] [[#37th|37]] [[#38th|38]] [[#39th|39]] [[#40th|40]] [[#Roof|R]] [[#Hovering Vulnerably 69 & 3/4 stories above the roof|69+3/4]] __NOTOC__  
 
</div>
 
</div>
 
===B-8===
 
===B-8===
*Generators (appropriate for nations of all technological developement)
+
*Generators (appropriate for nations of all technological development)
 
**Wood Stoves
 
**Wood Stoves
 
**Diesel Generators
 
**Diesel Generators
Line 20: Line 18:
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 8th Basement Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 8th Basement Floor:
***[[Forgotten Territories|Forgottenlands]]/[[Aberdeen]] UN offices
+
***[[Forgotten Territories|Forgottenlands]]/[[Aberdeen]] UN offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11116043&postcount=10]
  
 
===B-7===
 
===B-7===
Line 26: Line 24:
 
**Unofficial Listing of Offices on the 7th Basement Floor:
 
**Unofficial Listing of Offices on the 7th Basement Floor:
 
***[[UNOG]] Dungeon
 
***[[UNOG]] Dungeon
***[[Ausserland]] UN Offices
+
***[[Ausserland]] UN Offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11115788&postcount=6]
  
 
===B-6===
 
===B-6===
Line 36: Line 34:
 
===B-5===
 
===B-5===
 
*Parking  
 
*Parking  
**Hyrdogen fuel celled powered vehicles
+
**Hydrogen fuel celled powered vehicles
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 5th Basement Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 5th Basement Floor:
Line 52: Line 50:
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 3rd Basement Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 3rd Basement Floor:
***[[Gruenberg]] UN offices
+
***[[Gruenberg]] UN offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11193635&postcount=76]
 
===B-2===
 
===B-2===
 
*Parking  
 
*Parking  
Line 66: Line 64:
 
*Welcome Centre and Registration
 
*Welcome Centre and Registration
 
*[[UN Forum]]
 
*[[UN Forum]]
*[[General Assembly]] of the United Nations (occupies multiple floors)
 
 
*Gift shop
 
*Gift shop
 
*[[UN Building Mgmt]] offices
 
*[[UN Building Mgmt]] offices
 
+
[[Image:Generalassembly.jpg|right|frame|The [[General Assembly]] chambers.]]
 
===1st===
 
===1st===
*General Assembly of the United Nations
+
*[[General Assembly]] of the United Nations (occupies multiple floors)
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 1st Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 1st Floor:
***[[Jey]] UN Office
+
***[[Jey]] UN Office [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11115979&postcount=9]
 
***UN Gnomes Breakroom
 
***UN Gnomes Breakroom
  
Line 101: Line 98:
 
***United Nations' Law Interpretation Department Offices
 
***United Nations' Law Interpretation Department Offices
 
***[[Cluichstan]] UN Offices
 
***[[Cluichstan]] UN Offices
 +
***[[The Most Glorious Hack]] UN Offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11116439&postcount=15]
  
 
===6th===
 
===6th===
Line 106: Line 104:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 6th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 6th Floor:
 
***[[National Sovereignty Organization|NSO]] Saloon
 
***[[National Sovereignty Organization|NSO]] Saloon
***[[Allech-Atreus]] UN Offices & Multidimensional Transport Hub
+
***former [[Allech-Atreus]] office[http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12169283&postcount=127], now the [[Snefaldia]]n UN Offices[http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13064695&postcount=158]
  
 
===7th===
 
===7th===
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 7th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 7th Floor:
***[[Hirota]] UN offices
+
***[[Hirota]] UN offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11150512&postcount=62]
 
===8th===
 
===8th===
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 8th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 8th Floor:
***[[Omigodtheykilledkenny]] UN offices
+
***[[Omigodtheykilledkenny]] UN offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11699552&postcount=87]
***[[The Eternal Kawaii]] UN offices
+
***[[The Eternal Kawaii]] UN offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11173371&postcount=74]
 
===9th===
 
===9th===
 
*Cigar Lounge and smoking room
 
*Cigar Lounge and smoking room
Line 129: Line 127:
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 10th floor
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 10th floor
***[[Ariddia]] UN Offices
+
***[[Ariddia]] UN Offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11117981&postcount=23]
  
 
===11th===
 
===11th===
Line 136: Line 134:
 
***[[Green Think Tank]] Offices and Meeting Rooms
 
***[[Green Think Tank]] Offices and Meeting Rooms
 
===12th===
 
===12th===
*Multidenominational chapel
+
*Multi-denominational chapel
 
*UN Headquarters General Hospital
 
*UN Headquarters General Hospital
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
Line 146: Line 144:
 
**National Delegations found in the Strangers' Bar:
 
**National Delegations found in the Strangers' Bar:
 
***[[Roathin]]
 
***[[Roathin]]
***[[Ardchoille]]
+
***[[Ardchoille]] [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11130208&postcount=41]
 
***[[Bears Armed]]
 
***[[Bears Armed]]
 
***[[Invisible Wabbits]]
 
***[[Invisible Wabbits]]
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 13th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 13th Floor:
***[[Texan Hotrodders]] UN Offices
+
***[[HotRodia]] UN Offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11130055&postcount=40]
  
 
===14th===
 
===14th===
Line 162: Line 160:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 15th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 15th Floor:
 
***[[The Black New World]] UN Offices
 
***[[The Black New World]] UN Offices
***[[Altanar]] UN Offices
+
***[[Altanar]] UN Offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12006947&postcount=125]
  
 
===16th===
 
===16th===
Line 172: Line 170:
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 17th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 17th Floor:
***[[Ceorana]] UN Offices
+
***[[Ceorana]] UN Offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11695965&postcount=83]
***[[Khenas]] UN offices
+
 
*First Aid Centre
 
*First Aid Centre
 +
 
===18th===
 
===18th===
 
*Sky Lobby
 
*Sky Lobby
 
*Cafeteria
 
*Cafeteria
*[[R&R]] Repealing Centre
+
*[[R&R]] Repealing Centre Offices
**[[Cookesland]] UN Offices
+
 
 
===19th===
 
===19th===
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 19th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 19th Floor:
***[[Cobdenia]] UN Offices
+
***[[Cobdenia]] UN Offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11117725&postcount=20]
 +
[[Image:Feralbabies.jpg|right|frame|[[Yelda|Yeldan]] sculptor [[Yœthe Gørr]]'s masterpiece, My Struggles amongst the Feral Babies of Glog, stands outside the UN Building.]]
 
===20th===
 
===20th===
 
*Rock Wall
 
*Rock Wall
Line 207: Line 206:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 24th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 24th Floor:
 
***[[Flibbleites]] UN Offices
 
***[[Flibbleites]] UN Offices
***[[Crockeria]] UN Offices
 
  
 
===25th===
 
===25th===
Line 214: Line 212:
 
*VIP Area
 
*VIP Area
 
*All-Night Buffet
 
*All-Night Buffet
 +
 
===26th===
 
===26th===
 
*Grand Ballroom
 
*Grand Ballroom
Line 221: Line 220:
  
 
===27th===
 
===27th===
*All night discoteque
+
*All night discotheque
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 27th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 27th Floor:
***[[Community Property]] UN Offices
+
***[[Community Property]] UN Offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11743162&postcount=119]
  
 
===28th===
 
===28th===
 
*Bubba Gump Seafood Restaurant
 
*Bubba Gump Seafood Restaurant
 
*Tony's Palace Casino
 
*Tony's Palace Casino
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 28th Floor:
 
***[[Kampfers]] UN offices
 
  
 
===29th===
 
===29th===
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 29th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 29th Floor:
***Former offices of [[Enn]], now occupied by bizarre creatures decending from Ennish shandies.
+
***Former offices of [[Enn]], now occupied by bizarre creatures descending from Ennish shandies.
  
 
===30th===
 
===30th===
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 30th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 30th Floor:
***Secretary-General's ([[Catherine Gratwick]]) Offices
+
***Office of the Secretary-General ([[Sovereign UN Territory#Important People|Catherine Gratwick]])
 
***[[Sophista]] UN Offices
 
***[[Sophista]] UN Offices
  
Line 254: Line 250:
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 32nd Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 32nd Floor:
***[[Cobdenia]] UN Offices (the airducts above the florists)
+
***[[Cobdenia]] UN Offices (the air ducts above the florists)
  
 
===33rd===
 
===33rd===
Line 268: Line 264:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 34th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 34th Floor:
 
***[[Compadria]] UN Offices
 
***[[Compadria]] UN Offices
***[[Norderia]] UN Offices
+
***[[Norderia]] UN Offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11116530&postcount=17]
  
 
===35th===
 
===35th===
Line 278: Line 274:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 36th Floor:
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 36th Floor:
 
***[[UNEC]] Offices and Meeting Rooms
 
***[[UNEC]] Offices and Meeting Rooms
 +
 
===37th===
 
===37th===
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
Line 288: Line 285:
 
*Offices
 
*Offices
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 39th Floor
 
**Official Listing of Offices on the 39th Floor
***[[Drae Nei]] UN Offices
+
***[[Drae Nei]] UN Offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12002957&postcount=124]
 +
***[[Randomea]] UN Offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11117270&postcount=19]
  
 
===39th===
 
===39th===
Line 312: Line 310:
 
*"Offices"
 
*"Offices"
 
**Official Listing of "Offices" on the Roof:
 
**Official Listing of "Offices" on the Roof:
***[[St Edmundan Antarctic]] airship mooring-spire, & airship, on loan from [[St Edmund]]  
+
***[[St Edmundan Antarctic]] airship mooring-spire, & airship on loan from [[St Edmund]] [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11117923&postcount=22]  
 
***OMGTKK rooftop station
 
***OMGTKK rooftop station
 
***Flibbleite Airship Landing Pad
 
***Flibbleite Airship Landing Pad
* Former [[The Syndicate]] regional offices (Broom closet of the Tank house).
 
  
 
===Hovering Vulnerably 69 & 3/4 stories above the roof===
 
===Hovering Vulnerably 69 & 3/4 stories above the roof===
Line 322: Line 319:
 
***Abandoned [[Love and esterel]] UN Offices, now used by CPESL as a Servicewomen's Lounge  
 
***Abandoned [[Love and esterel]] UN Offices, now used by CPESL as a Servicewomen's Lounge  
 
***[[The Beltway]] UN Offices
 
***[[The Beltway]] UN Offices
***[[The Wolf Guardians]] UN Offices
+
***[[The Wolf Guardians]] UN Offices [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11747034&postcount=121]
  
 
==Additional Materials==
 
==Additional Materials==
Line 329: Line 326:
 
*[[UN Timeline]]<br>
 
*[[UN Timeline]]<br>
 
*[[UN Forum]]<br>
 
*[[UN Forum]]<br>
 +
* [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=486600 What is your UN rep's office like?]
 
* [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=310853 United Nations Strangers' Bar]
 
* [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=310853 United Nations Strangers' Bar]
 
*[http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=9958764&postcount=9 Where is the UN Building?]<br>
 
*[http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=9958764&postcount=9 Where is the UN Building?]<br>
 +
* [http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=507747 Routine floor debate explodes into all-out brawl]
 
*[http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=438181 Daring expedition to the 40th floor]<br>
 
*[http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=438181 Daring expedition to the 40th floor]<br>
 
*[http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=458995 UN resignation sparks office-space feud]
 
*[http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=458995 UN resignation sparks office-space feud]
Line 338: Line 337:
 
[[Category:World Heritage List]]
 
[[Category:World Heritage List]]
 
[[Category:Buildings]]
 
[[Category:Buildings]]
 +
[[Category:UN Building Mgmt]]

Latest revision as of 18:11, 10 October 2007


The UN Building, a grotesque, mismatched nightmare of architectural design. To shore up funding (something the UN distinctly lacks), UN Building Mgmt has had to lease out ad space near the ground level.

The UN Headquarters -- a massive complex comprising a 40-story building; substantial basement digs; a bar full of drunken diplomats; a saloon for filthy sovereigntist outlaws; an underground bunker where concerned nations secretly devise international-security schemes; and a dank, cobweb-filled dungeon where shadowy figures supposedly plot the UN's every move -- is reserved for conducting business pertaining to the NationStates United Nations. It occupies a secure, undisclosed location (though some say it sits in Sovereign UN Territory), where incidents involving militarized penguins, foul-mouthed naval dolphins, Cluichstani "servicewomen," Stripper Commandos, mysterious robed otaku, robot destructor bunnies, sacred goats, scummy Compliance Ministry gnomes, anti-UN gnomes (employed by the OMGTKK delegation), a talking cat, diplomatic dwarves and other odd sapient beings, an ambiguously gay barkeep, a strange man handing round marzipan babies and a flatulent dragon going by the name Gurgle -- are common. Many UN ambassadors have permanent offices here, though many delegations have had to hire on substantial security staff as much of the complex has been deemed unsafe: mutants and other bizarre creatures are fabled to have overrun large portions of the building's underground real-estate, as well as the floors formerly occupied by Enn and DemonLordEnigma. In addition, packs of overzealous office-stealers constantly prowl the halls, poised to bagsy a departing member's office and/or office supplies at a moment's notice. The facilities are managed by a vast bureaucracy aptly named the UN Building Mgmt, the staff of which tirelessly and thanklessly sees to mountains of paperwork, maintenance, cleaning and divvying out much-demanded office space. Most UN business is conducted on the UN Forum or in the enormous, multi-story General Assembly chamber, though other affairs are negotiated in various committee rooms, meeting rooms for the UN's resident think-tanks, and the Strangers' Bar -- envoys often pulling cards from the UN Deck to state their government's position on issues that come before the international body.

Floor Index

B-8

  • Generators (appropriate for nations of all technological development)
    • Wood Stoves
    • Diesel Generators
    • Nuclear Generators
    • Steam Generators
    • Plasma Generators
    • Magic Generators
  • Offices

B-7

  • Secret Offices
    • Unofficial Listing of Offices on the 7th Basement Floor:

B-6

  • Parking
    • Thermo-nuclear powered vehicles
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 6th Basement Floor:

B-5

  • Parking
    • Hydrogen fuel celled powered vehicles
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 5th Basement Floor:

B-4

  • Parking
    • Electrically powered vehicles
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 4th Basement Floor:

B-3

  • Parking
    • Diesel and petroleum powered vehicles
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 3rd Basement Floor:

B-2

  • Parking
    • Steam powered vehicles
  • Underground station

B-1

  • Stables
  • Valet Parking

Ground Floor

  • Portals in and out of the building
  • Ship Dock
  • Lobby and waiting rooms
  • Welcome Centre and Registration
  • UN Forum
  • Gift shop
  • UN Building Mgmt offices
The General Assembly chambers.

1st

  • General Assembly of the United Nations (occupies multiple floors)
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 1st Floor:
      • Jey UN Office [4]
      • UN Gnomes Breakroom

2nd

  • General Assembly of the United Nations
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 2nd Floor:
      • UN Building Management Offices

3rd

  • General Assembly of the United Nations
  • Offices

4th

  • Translation Room
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 4th Floor:
      • FAIRTRADE offices, meeting rooms, petting zoo, and tie-dye centre
      • UN Awards Committee Offices

5th

6th

7th

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 7th Floor:

8th

9th

  • Cigar Lounge and smoking room
  • Library
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 9th Floor:

10th

  • Library
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 10th floor

11th

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 11th Floor:

12th

  • Multi-denominational chapel
  • UN Headquarters General Hospital
  • Offices

13th

14th

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 14th Floor:

15th

16th

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 16th Floor:

17th

  • Karaoke Bar
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 17th Floor:
  • First Aid Centre

18th

  • Sky Lobby
  • Cafeteria
  • R&R Repealing Centre Offices

19th

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 19th Floor:
Yeldan sculptor Yœthe Gørr's masterpiece, My Struggles amongst the Feral Babies of Glog, stands outside the UN Building.

20th

  • Rock Wall
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 20th Floor:
      • Enn UN Offices
  • Sports Centre

21st

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 21st Floor:
      • Fonzoland UN Offices
      • Cobdenia UN Offices (last stall on the left in the disused ladies' toilets)

22nd

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 22nd Floor:

23rd

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 23rd Floor:

24th

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 24th Floor:

25th

  • Food Court
    • McDonalds
  • VIP Area
  • All-Night Buffet

26th

  • Grand Ballroom
  • Offices

27th

  • All night discotheque
  • Offices

28th

  • Bubba Gump Seafood Restaurant
  • Tony's Palace Casino

29th

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 29th Floor:
      • Former offices of Enn, now occupied by bizarre creatures descending from Ennish shandies.

30th

31st

  • Shopping Centre
    • Wesco's Supermarket

32nd

  • Shopping Centre
  • Starbucks
  • Lo Fat's Chinese Laundry
  • NSUN Lawyers Frogurt Stand
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 32nd Floor:
      • Cobdenia UN Offices (the air ducts above the florists)

33rd

  • Shopping Centre
    • Wawa
    • Walmart
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 33rd Floor:

34th

35th

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 35th Floor:
      • IRCO Offices and Meeting Rooms

36th

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 36th Floor:
      • UNEC Offices and Meeting Rooms

37th

  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 37th Floor:
      • UNSC Offices and Meeting Rooms
      • Zanski UN Offices

38th

  • Formerly Restaurant La Fou-Fou, currently being demolished for Randomea's UN offices, for serving without a food license.
  • Offices

39th

  • Viewing platform
  • Gift shop
  • Offices
    • Official Listing of Offices on the 39th Floor
      • IMO Headquarters

40th

NOTE: Large areas of this floor are considered uninhabitable from the period when occupied by DemonLordEnigma

Roof

  • Helipad
  • Time Machine
  • Teleportation Device
  • Defensive Weapons (installed by UN DEFCON)
  • Offensive Weapons (installed by UN DEFCON)
  • "Offices"
    • Official Listing of "Offices" on the Roof:

Hovering Vulnerably 69 & 3/4 stories above the roof

Additional Materials