UN Rankings

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UN Rankings actually have almost nothing to do with the United Nations. They supposedly reflect the ranking scores noted by travelling UN inspectors who rate national statistics in various areas, and then scale them by region and across the whole game.

Rankings are found on every region page under the heading, Today's United Nations Report. They take the form of The [ranking] in [Region], followed by a standard [Description line]. The same report is generated worldwide, with the top line replaced with The [ranking] in the World

Many players take pride in their regional or worldwide rankings, and strive to answer issues and support UN resolutions that move them closer to the top ... or bottom ... of different ranking categories.

Ranking Description line
Best Weather The following nations were determined to have the best all-round weather.
Fastest-Growing Economies
Greatest Rich-Poor Divides
Happiest Citizens A recent survey attempted to measure the average happiness of citizens in various nations. These results should be treated with caution, however, as results tend to fluctuate from day to day.
Healthiest Nations A measure of the general health of an average citizen in each nation.
Highest Average Tax Rates Although some nations have similar tax rates for all citizens and others tax the rich much more heavily than the poor, the following provides a rough guide to the most taxing governments.
Highest Police Ratios
Highest Unemployment Rates
Largest Agricultural Sector
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector
Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector
Largest Basket Weaving Sector
Largest Cheese Export Sector
Largest Defense Forces (per capita)
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry
Largest Gambling Industry
Largest Information Technology Sector
Largest Insurance Industry
Largest Manufacturing Sector
Largest Mining Sector
Largest Nations
Largest Pizza Delivery Sector
Largest Public Sector Nations ranked high on this list have the highest proportions of their citizens employed in government administration.
Largest Publishing Industry
Largest Retail Sector
Largest Soda Pop Sector
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry
Largest Trout Fishing Sector
Largest Welfare Programs (per capita)
Lowest Crime Rates
Most Beautiful Environments UN researchers spent many arduous weeks lying on beaches and trekking through rainforests to compile this definitive list of the most attractive and best cared for environments.
Most Compassionate Citizens Exhaustive UN tests involving kittens revealed the following nations to be the most compassionate.
Most Comprehensive Public Healthcare
Most Corrupt Governments
Most Cultured
Most Devout Nations UN experts polled citizens from nations worldwide to determine which seemed to be the most religious.
Most Eco-Friendly Governments
Most Extreme Nations
Most Income Equality
Most Liberal Nations
Most likely to be deleted * The following nations were judged most likely to be GORTed by the vast Moderator Conspiracy
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens These results were determined by seeing how many citizens of each nation answered a recent UN survey on the local political situation by ticking the "Don't Give a Damn" box.
Most Politically Free Nations These nations allow citizens the greatest amount of freedom to select their own government.
Most Pro-Market Nations
Most Rebellious Youth
Most Subsidized Industry
Nicest Citizens
Nudest The following nations have the most liberal attitudes to public nudity.
Rudest Citizens
Safest Nations
Smartest Citizens IQ tests were sent to random citizens from various nations in an attempt to determine which nations are the smartest and best educated, on average. Those citizens who failed to return their tests were scored poorly.
Stupidest Citizens
  • This was a special one-time-only ranking for April Fools Day, 2005. There was some discussion at the time noting that many Nazi nations placed very low on the list. Naturally, this was attributed to the vast Moderator Conspiracy.