Difference between revisions of ""My Fat Lardy""
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Therefore, the cast of My Fat Lardy had to rehearse in secret. The performers pretended that they were taking part in a television show, in order to fool the police. | Therefore, the cast of My Fat Lardy had to rehearse in secret. The performers pretended that they were taking part in a television show, in order to fool the police. | ||
| − | ==No, no, no, I meant "what happens in the play?" | + | ==No, no, no, I meant "what happens in the play?"== |
Oh, well, um, basically there's this fat slob, Edna Eateverything (played by Jolie Badnews in the original version) [Original? You mean there was more than one?], and this fitness freak, Jimmy Joggins (played by Reckt Harrassed-Sigh in both versions) and he tries to make her thin. | Oh, well, um, basically there's this fat slob, Edna Eateverything (played by Jolie Badnews in the original version) [Original? You mean there was more than one?], and this fitness freak, Jimmy Joggins (played by Reckt Harrassed-Sigh in both versions) and he tries to make her thin. | ||
Revision as of 17:00, 5 August 2007
Contents
My Fat Lardy
My Fat Lardy was a musical, based on Gawdy Blasted Shirt's play, "Pigoutathon". It was notable as being the first underground musical, after the police proclamation of 1836. A permanent ban on musicals was introduced, only days later, by gubernatorial decree [see Section 179, Paragraph 2 of the Governors' Big Dusty Book of Rules ].
Plot
On 17 May 1836, Supper Attendant Charles Goodetaste banned "musical plays (and unmusical ones, for that matter)" within the city walls of Wonkytown, after a production of "The Mounds that Ooze Sick", had been judged to be "not inconsiderably injurious to the hearing and psychological wellbeing of the populace of the metropolis".
Goodetaste was, at that time, Head of the Criminal Music Department of the Wonkytown City Guard, known as "The Bangers", from the type of ammunition that they used. He was also a leading figure [rather like a "5", with a big belly and a cap] in the Robotic Language Revival movement. Although, Robotic itself was phased out within the police service after the Odorous Ruination, Goodetaste successfully campaigned for the right of the Petits Ruminants to have official correspondence translated into a sister language, Tortaltawsh. The effect of this can still be seen, today.
The Commissioners of Public Sanity ( or "Headbangers") were charged with keeping the peace and quiet [I didn't know that it was ever a criminal offence. Ooh, I gotcha- charged as in "responsible for". Sorry.], and feared that the city was running out of ear plugs. Impressed by his quick thinking and determination, they recommended Goodetaste for a gong but he said he'd far rather have a hostess cart, so the Governors gave him the one, which Dolly deTrolley had used, almost fifty years earlier. It had been on display in the Bored Room at Rareness Palace but they kept banging their knees on it, when they came through the door, and were actually quite glad to be rid of it. Happily, the famous trolley is still in the possession of the Goodetaste family, along with the fondue set which his son, Charles Goodetaste (Junior) (1835-1922) [aka "Cheesy Charles"] was awarded, by public subscription, for his research on Unexplained Mouse/ Expired Rodent UM/ER Syndrome, in the late Nineteenth Century.
On 17 May 1836 [You've done that bit- Wikiplodia]... Sorry, I was looking over my specs again. Goodetaste's prompt action resulted in the passing of not one but three Collective Sighs of Relief by the Governors, at an emergency meeting on on Monday 21 May 1836. They had all tied cushions to the sides of their heads, during performances, because Jolie Badnews's voice was able to penetrate masonry to a depth of 2 boings (about 26 inches).
Therefore, the cast of My Fat Lardy had to rehearse in secret. The performers pretended that they were taking part in a television show, in order to fool the police.
No, no, no, I meant "what happens in the play?"
Oh, well, um, basically there's this fat slob, Edna Eateverything (played by Jolie Badnews in the original version) [Original? You mean there was more than one?], and this fitness freak, Jimmy Joggins (played by Reckt Harrassed-Sigh in both versions) and he tries to make her thin.
Why?
Don't forget that there was no such thing as "slobism", in those days. Anyway, one day, while down at the gym, Joggins opens his big gob and says to his mate, Colin Pickernose (played by Gilbert Hair-Fright in the film and some bloke they stole from an old people's home in the original), "I'll bet you anyfink I can get take any fat bird and make 'er gawjuss. No, bettah than tha, I can take any fat bird, make 'er gawjuss END git 'er to run in the marafin."
"A Gross o' Pencils says you cawn't.", replies Pickernose.
"Yer on!", says Joggins, squeezing Pickernose's hand.
Sounds fascinating
I think that's one of the reasons why musicals were banned.
The first performance of the musical was given in the cellars of The Old Torture Chamber Theatre, which was demolished in 1877, to make way for Bratcasting House, home of the National Actors Federation Executive Repetoiry (NAFFER) Featre, sorry, Theatre. It is rumoured that the torture chamber still exists, somewhere in the complex.
In the play, Professor Jimmy Joggins takes on slob, Edna Eateverything, as his patient, and tries to get her to exercise more and reduce her calorie intake.
