Difference between revisions of "Formica Woodtops"
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In a recent election, the people decided to elect 174 year old funnyman, bigot, and noted gentlemen Jim Davidson as the town's mayor on a promise to bring ''""Cheer Up The City!"'' by making his collection of hilarious and enlightening DVDs of his outstanding and unparalleled 150 year career as a stand-up comedian available to every citizen. Incredibly, the offer has actually increased the level of suicides throughout the city, and incidents of race-related violence have recently hit an all time high. | In a recent election, the people decided to elect 174 year old funnyman, bigot, and noted gentlemen Jim Davidson as the town's mayor on a promise to bring ''""Cheer Up The City!"'' by making his collection of hilarious and enlightening DVDs of his outstanding and unparalleled 150 year career as a stand-up comedian available to every citizen. Incredibly, the offer has actually increased the level of suicides throughout the city, and incidents of race-related violence have recently hit an all time high. | ||
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Revision as of 15:33, 13 March 2005
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Formica Woodtops is currently the seat of the Federal Government for the Federation of Wharf Springs. It was made the capital city of the nation after the "Lemon Divorce" between Wharf Springs and Induced Capitalism after the representatives of the states in the Federation decided that a change in scenery was required; the old parliament building in MFI Kitchenalia was beginning to fill with the stench of capitalist dogs and their dirty back pocket money that always happens to absorb a feculent fragrance.
It is a large and mostly unremarkable place, mainly due to the fact that the struggling economy of the nation means the government cannot afford to invest in its infrastructure. The roads are little more than primitive dust tracks, and the public transport remains in a state of decay after the city authorities continue to refuse investment in new buses, instead preferring to continue patching up the now 80-year-old red London Buses purchased off London, England some 70 years ago.
The population is densely packed in the centre of the city in the hundreds of 15-storey tower blocks built on the cheap by the government. There are numerous suburbs to the city, spanning out for several miles on all sides. However, since most people don't work in the city-centre, indeed, most people don't even work, they are residents of the city in name only. Depression and suicide rates are by far the highest in the 18 Beech Grove region, and there is currently a rising problem of crime as the government's economic liberalisation starts to make people jealous of the material possessions of others.
In a recent election, the people decided to elect 174 year old funnyman, bigot, and noted gentlemen Jim Davidson as the town's mayor on a promise to bring ""Cheer Up The City!" by making his collection of hilarious and enlightening DVDs of his outstanding and unparalleled 150 year career as a stand-up comedian available to every citizen. Incredibly, the offer has actually increased the level of suicides throughout the city, and incidents of race-related violence have recently hit an all time high.
