Lois-Must-Die
The Rogue Nation of Lois-Must-Die was founded thousands of years ago by wandering nomad shepherds in the ancient oil-rich deserts of Valdesia. The people found few areas for growing crops, but plenty of land fit for raising livestock, and animal husbandry has remained a staple of the Lois-Must-Die economy, followed in later years by arms manufacturing and uranium mining. Lois-Must-Die quickly established trade with the other nations in the region. A Valdorothan declaring himself Prophet of the One True God visited early in Lois-Must-Die's history, and the people of the desert nation have been devoutly -- many fanatically -- religious ever since.
Ali, a tribal ruler with great influence among Lois-Must-Die's merchants and religious leaders emerged as the first king of the whole nation around 1000 B.C. Notorious for ruthlessness and brutality, Ali tightened his grip on the nation, sucking up vast sums of its wealth, until the economy was on the brink of collapse. His dynasty was passed down through the ages until about A.D. 65, when Gehinnan nobleman Justinian invaded and overthrew the weak Ali king. Anxious for relief from the Ali kings' harsh rule, Lois-Must-Die's people welcomed the advancing armies, but soon learned that Justinian's rule would be no more friendly than the Alis'. Justinian rapidly earned Gehinna the enduring contempt of Lois-Must-Die's people, and was put down in a revolt in 79, when a sheik named Omaro seized power as emir. Omaro proved every bit as ruthless as Justinian and the Alis, but he legalized prostitution, so the people tolerated him.
The Omarian emirs continued their rule of Lois-Must-Die until 1939, when a brutal military leader Gen. Hashish Abdullah overthrew the Omarian dynasty and declared himself dictator. Abdullah shut down the nation's many thriving brothels and exercized total control over all the people's lives. He slaughtered business and religious leaders who disagreed with him. He made war on neighboring Gehinna, continuing his assault for five years, only to see 70,000 Gehinnans and 35,000 of his own people dead before agreeing to end the conflict in a disappointing draw. Abdullah's power was greatly weakened by the Gehinna War, and one of his understudies deposed him in 1950.
Ashfari Gehhonai ruled Lois-Must-Die with an iron fist until 1979, when he was deposed by his deputy, Husseini Sharif. Sharif continued in Lois-Must-Die's tradition of brutal leadership, and started executing southern nomadic shepherds. He unleashed chemical bombs on revolting shepherds in 1982, and on Gehinna in 1985, resulting in the 8-year Gehinna War II, where 200,000 people lost their lives. Sharif finally repelled Gehinna's invasion forces in 1993, but both nations found themselves under U.N. mandates to disarm. Gehinna did so quickly, but Sharif repeatedly resisted and obstructed inspections efforts. Sharif is widely blamed for a deadly terrorist attack on Vandross, where three commercial airliners were destroyed by homemade bombs before takeoff, but little evidence connects him to the attackers.
In a highly controversial move, the Republic of Omigodtheykilledkenny and seven Amerantan allies invaded Lois-Must-Die in 2000 and overthrew Sharif, it said, to enforce the demands of the U.N. Amerantans imposed elections, from which emerged an equally despicable leader, Ali Rushafa, as president. Though just as brutal as all the leaders who came before him, Rushafa was willing to disarm, and was generally friendly toward Ameranta. In any case, Amerantans insisted Rushafa was "democratically elected," and therefore the legitimate choice of Lois-Must-Die's people.
In recent years, Rushafa has exchanged alarmingly threatening communiques with nearly all of Valdesia's leaders, though he has maintained very close relations with Omigodtheykilledkenny and its Amerantan allies. The national economy has improved slightly under Rushafa, and Lois-Must-Die remains among the strongest of Valdesia's military powers, behind Dragons Rider and Gehinna. In addition, Rushafa has allowed Omigodtheykilledkenny to maintain a heavy military presence within Lois-Must-Die's borders, which some clerics and devout citizens consider deeply sacrilegious and threatening to holy shrines in the country. Lois-Must-Die maintains a strong alliance with regional partners The Great White Knight and Mark Tom and Travis. Rumors persist that the alliance and Gehinna are preparing for war with each other.
