Moltan Bausch

Moltan Bausch
Nationality Gruenberger Politics Conservative; sovereigntist Dislikes Human rights; animal rights; workers' rights; 'lefties' Likes Repeals

Moltan Bausch is the Ambassador to the United Nations for the Sultanate of Gruenberg, and heads the Gruenberger Office of UN Affairs. He has held the office ever since Gruenberg's re-entry into the UN following the defeat of the Transgender Equality Act.

A staunch conservative, he has become an increasingly dogmatic proponent of the principle of national sovereignty, a source of some criticism. He is known for his abject lack of a sense of humour, quasi-fetishistic obsession with the Law of the Sea, and avowed hatred of environmental legislation. And dolphins.

Biography

Moltanus Keinhart Bausch was born in The 688th Year in Kemf Waaschtechen, a small mining town in Stammerslab. He was the first of four children of Eisodor and Krakalopowot Bausch, wealthy textile merchants. From an early age it was clear that he would be suited to a career in the Gruenberger diplomatic corps: he was expelled from the exclusive Raasbeh Academy For Little Lords at age eight for stabbing a classmate in the neck with a wooden sword. He went on to attend the prestigious Wellen School. A popular and outspoken pupil, he was promoted to Cadet Warrant Officer and senior student NCO in the school cadet force. He instituted the now famous 'Wena's Day Parade', on which the entire corps would complete a solemn three hour procession around the quad before going on a violent rampage through the local town. He also had his first experience of rhetoric when he was forced to explain trading the debate team's minibus for a month's supply of frozen yogurt. His time at the University of Flurthwel was undistinguished academically — originally registered to read Political Science, he switched courses in his second year, and ended up taking a Basic Certificate in Bee-Keeping, obtaining a Merit for his intricate comb-work — but saw him get his first taste of politics, when he ran for election to the student council on a "Burn the heathens" platform. He lost, heavily.

Bausch the brave

After completing postgraduate studies — although it remains unclear what, and indeed whether, he actually researched — he took a commission with the 43rd High Sultanic Dragoons, and was stationed to West Gelzia. When tensions escalated into open violence in the province, his unit was mobilised. He served three tours of duty, spanning a total of four years; interestingly, a ceasefire had been negotiated after 18 months. When hostilities finally ended — it purportedly took seven men to hold him back — he returned to Naffarron recipient of the Gruen Cross, the highest military honour in Gruenberg, and was offered a place on the board of Gsgsgsgsgsgsgsfffffffffft Industries. He told them to fuck off until they came up with a more sensible name, and embarked on a year-long 'cultural tour of the world', at the end of which he was treated for minor cirrhosis. In the meantime, Gsgsgsgsgsgsgsfffffffffft had renamed themselves United Uranium, and Bausch accepted a position as Commercial Director. His first act was to suggest the company abandon their novelty keyring projects, and concentrate on actually mining uranium.

Bausch the businessman

He held the position of Commercial Director for eight years, taking United Uranium into a position of national dominance through a mixture of ruthless business strategies and thumb-screws. By the early 720s, United Uranium had established a total monopoly in the Gruenberger mining sector, no doubt aided by massive Court hand-outs, mostly arranged by Bausch himself. He was also allowed to sit in as an official observer on the negotiations with New Greater Tibet to allow Gruenberger corporations — led by United Uranium — increased access to Tibetanese uranium deposits. One of his most significant achievements was negotiating a merger with Combined Chemical Manufactures, and he is believed to have been the principle author of the contract (the text of which read "We get to keep your assets; you get to keep your kneecaps"). His relationship with United Uranium ended on a sour note, however, when his increasingly audacious expenses claims began to cause concern in the accounting department. When they refused to allow him to charge a helicopter as 'communications optimisations', he stormed out. Subsequent accusations of massive embezzlement attracted the interest of the State Department of Foreign Affairs, who approached him with a job offer.

Bausch the bureaucrat

Little is known of Bausch's activities during his time as Deputy Secretary of Administration in the DoFA. He has suggested that this apparent lack of industry is actually on account of many of the projects on which he worked being classified. A more likely hypothesis is that he just spent most of the time in the local pub, as evidenced by many photographs and two police cautions.

[[Image:Mb3.jpg|frame|Following the defeat of Bausch has been accused of involvement with the shadowy "Basket Fisting" fetishist cult