Difference between revisions of "Cobdenian Mission to the United Nations"
(→His Exellency Sir Cyril Gordon Muffplaster Radionov Casaba O'Mahoney Askalan DeDerrier von Holsterman Wyznyjytski Ungern-Sturmberg Banerjee Svenssen M'Beki Vicenzo MacLehose-Strangways-Jones III, KCRC, LOG) |
(→Major-General Sir Brian Alexander Montgomery Haig "Pointy" Blatherstock, KOG, CRC, CGO (retired)) |
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− | The [[Cobdenia]] | + | The [[Cobdenia|Cobdenian]] Mission to the [[United Nations]] is Cobdenia's permanent diplomatic staff based in the United Nations. Its goal is "To further the Cobdenian government's policy of the promotion of international discourse, the belief in sportsmanlike conduct in wartime, the introduction of international maritime law, and the promotion of free trade". It is currently located on the 19th floor of the UN building, although it also possesses "office space" on the 21st and 32nd floors. There are currently nine number of permanent staff. |
__NOTOC__ | __NOTOC__ | ||
==Personnel== | ==Personnel== | ||
===His Cobdenian Excellency's Permanent Representative to the United Nations=== | ===His Cobdenian Excellency's Permanent Representative to the United Nations=== | ||
====His Exellency Sir Cyril Gordon Muffplaster Radionov Casaba O'Mahoney Askalan DeDerrier von Holsterman Wyznyjytski Ungern-Sturmberg Banerjee Svenssen M'Beki Vicenzo MacLehose-Strangways-Jones III, KCRC, LOG==== | ====His Exellency Sir Cyril Gordon Muffplaster Radionov Casaba O'Mahoney Askalan DeDerrier von Holsterman Wyznyjytski Ungern-Sturmberg Banerjee Svenssen M'Beki Vicenzo MacLehose-Strangways-Jones III, KCRC, LOG==== | ||
− | {{http://img.search.com/d/d2/Btweedsmuir2.jpg}} | + | {{Image|http://img.search.com/d/d2/Btweedsmuir2.jpg|left|Sir Cyril|}} |
− | + | ||
{{main|Cyril MacLehose-Strangways-Jones}} | {{main|Cyril MacLehose-Strangways-Jones}} | ||
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'''Employment''': Career diplomat in the Cobdenian Foreign and Regional Office, formerly the Department of Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs. Also a fully qualified fireman and a champion spaniel breeder | '''Employment''': Career diplomat in the Cobdenian Foreign and Regional Office, formerly the Department of Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs. Also a fully qualified fireman and a champion spaniel breeder | ||
− | '''Background''': Father was a Prestigious British Diplomat serving in the High Commission in Port Sir Richard; mother was a Cobdenian school teacher. He was single handedly responsible for the outbreak of the Dull and Fairly Short War of 1902 when he | + | '''Background''': Father was a Prestigious British Diplomat serving in the High Commission in Port Sir Richard; mother was a Cobdenian school teacher. He was single handedly responsible for the outbreak of the Dull and Fairly Short War of 1902 when he accidentally assassinated Archduke Alexander Kapranos when the spoon he was wielding turned out to be loaded. In 1920, he served as [[Kenny Diplomatic Service|Ambassador]] to [[Omigodtheykilledkenny]], and due to his stirling efforts to bring the two countries together, and the fact he actually didn't end up going to war with them. Replaced Sir Leslie Featherstonehaugh-Mickelwhaite-Cholmondsey-Cholmondsey-Smythe, KCRC as UN representative in 1930 |
'''Politics''': Strong sovereigntist except on issues of Free Trade | '''Politics''': Strong sovereigntist except on issues of Free Trade | ||
− | '''Responsibilities within the UN Office''': Has plenipotentiary power, and thus it is he who has full | + | '''Responsibilities within the UN Office''': Has plenipotentiary power, and thus it is he who has full responsibility for the Cobdenian votes. |
'''Interests''': International Diplomacy, shipping regulations | '''Interests''': International Diplomacy, shipping regulations | ||
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'''Birthplace''': North Holden, Buckinghamshire | '''Birthplace''': North Holden, Buckinghamshire | ||
− | '''Family''': | + | '''Family''': Too complicated to explain here. See [[Brian Blatherstock]] |
'''Education''': Hornby College, Sussex, RMC Sandhurst | '''Education''': Hornby College, Sussex, RMC Sandhurst | ||
− | '''Employment''': British Army Royal East Kent Regiment 1893-1904 served, South Africa 1879, Chitral, Relief of Kimberley, Paardeberg, South Africa 1900-02 reaching rank of of Major; British-Indian Army 39th Garhwal Rifles 1904-1919, served in Punjab Frontier, Bassée 1914, Armentières 1914, Festubert 1914 '15, Neuve Chapelle, Aubers, France and Flanders 1914-15, Egypt 1915-16, Khan Baghdadi, Sharqat, Mesopotamia 1917-18, Macedonia 1918 reaching rank of Major; British-Cobdenian Army South N Sussex Regiment 1919-1922, reaching rank of Lt-Colonel; British-Cobdenian/Cobdenian Army General Staff of the War Department 1922-1930 reaching current rank of Major-General; Retired 1930 following balloon accident, making him "Possibly the | + | '''Employment''': British Army Royal East Kent Regiment 1893-1904 served, South Africa 1879, Chitral, Relief of Kimberley, Paardeberg, South Africa 1900-02 reaching rank of of Major; British-Indian Army 39th Garhwal Rifles 1904-1919, served in Punjab Frontier, Bassée 1914, Armentières 1914, Festubert 1914 '15, Neuve Chapelle, Aubers, France and Flanders 1914-15, Egypt 1915-16, Khan Baghdadi, Sharqat, Mesopotamia 1917-18, Macedonia 1918 reaching rank of Major; British-Cobdenian Army South N Sussex Regiment 1919-1922, reaching rank of Lt-Colonel; British-Cobdenian/Cobdenian Army General Staff of the War Department 1922-1930 reaching current rank of Major-General; Retired 1930 following balloon accident, making him "Possibly the stupidest man ever to wear a uniform" according to the late Governor-General |
'''Background''': Wealthy family; father was a Captain in the Royal Navy. Aquired the nickname "Pointy" after his habit of pointing to places on battlefields without actually giving any orders | '''Background''': Wealthy family; father was a Captain in the Royal Navy. Aquired the nickname "Pointy" after his habit of pointing to places on battlefields without actually giving any orders | ||
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===Legal Advisor=== | ===Legal Advisor=== | ||
====The Honourable Sir Barrington Womble==== | ====The Honourable Sir Barrington Womble==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | {{main|Sir Barrington Womble}} | ||
{{Image|http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/f/f0/180px-Goddard.jpg|right|Womble|Sir Barrington Womble}} | {{Image|http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/f/f0/180px-Goddard.jpg|right|Womble|Sir Barrington Womble}} | ||
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'''Education''': School of Lifemanship | '''Education''': School of Lifemanship | ||
− | '''Employment''': Very shady past. Known to have been involved in the following: Planning to sell the guided NAAFI secrets to the Russians, booby-trapping the boots of the Hungarian Football team, and the | + | '''Employment''': Very shady past. Known to have been involved in the following: Planning to sell the guided NAAFI secrets to the Russians, booby-trapping the boots of the Hungarian Football team, and the disappearance of the crew of the Marie Celest, Has also worked as a Police Inspector in Bexhill, the butler to the British Prime Minister, and as a conman. |
− | '''Background''': Serial conman and | + | '''Background''': Serial conman and embezzler, also a master blackmailer |
'''Politics''': Conservative | '''Politics''': Conservative | ||
− | '''Responsibilities within the UN Office''': | + | '''Responsibilities within the UN Office''': Embezzlement and blackmail |
'''Interests''': Furthering his own financial interests | '''Interests''': Furthering his own financial interests | ||
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'''Education''': Riccardoton Girl's School | '''Education''': Riccardoton Girl's School | ||
− | '''Employment''': Joined the Cobdenian | + | '''Employment''': Joined the Cobdenian Foreign and Regional Office in 1927, and been serving with Sir Cyril ever since |
'''Background''': Middle class parents | '''Background''': Middle class parents | ||
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'''Interests''': Sir Cyril. Apparently, he's got a stonka | '''Interests''': Sir Cyril. Apparently, he's got a stonka | ||
− | ===Secretary to Deputy Permanent | + | ===Secretary to Deputy Permanent Representative=== |
====Miss. Claudia Ingebritsen==== | ====Miss. Claudia Ingebritsen==== | ||
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'''Education''': None | '''Education''': None | ||
− | '''Employment''': Known to have worked with Mr Grytpype-Thynne for some time, usually as his lacky or | + | '''Employment''': Known to have worked with Mr Grytpype-Thynne for some time, usually as his lacky or whipping boy, and as such has the same shady past as his superior. Claims to have played the male lead in over 50 postcards, acted as the Minister without underpants to the Principality of Monte Carlo, and the world barbed-wire hurdling champion until his unfortunate accident. None of which are verified |
'''Background''': Unknown; possibly Impoverished French Aristocratic | '''Background''': Unknown; possibly Impoverished French Aristocratic |
Latest revision as of 05:50, 7 October 2007
The Cobdenian Mission to the United Nations is Cobdenia's permanent diplomatic staff based in the United Nations. Its goal is "To further the Cobdenian government's policy of the promotion of international discourse, the belief in sportsmanlike conduct in wartime, the introduction of international maritime law, and the promotion of free trade". It is currently located on the 19th floor of the UN building, although it also possesses "office space" on the 21st and 32nd floors. There are currently nine number of permanent staff.
Personnel
His Cobdenian Excellency's Permanent Representative to the United Nations
His Exellency Sir Cyril Gordon Muffplaster Radionov Casaba O'Mahoney Askalan DeDerrier von Holsterman Wyznyjytski Ungern-Sturmberg Banerjee Svenssen M'Beki Vicenzo MacLehose-Strangways-Jones III, KCRC, LOG
</div>- Main article(s): Cyril MacLehose-Strangways-Jones
Age: 51
Birthplace: Port Sir Richard, Cobdenia
Family: 300 illegitimate children
Education: Riccardoton Girls school (hence the 300 illegitimate children); Hailsham College; Port Sir Richard University. Holds a double first class honours degree in Irritating Funny Foreigners
Employment: Career diplomat in the Cobdenian Foreign and Regional Office, formerly the Department of Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs. Also a fully qualified fireman and a champion spaniel breeder
Background: Father was a Prestigious British Diplomat serving in the High Commission in Port Sir Richard; mother was a Cobdenian school teacher. He was single handedly responsible for the outbreak of the Dull and Fairly Short War of 1902 when he accidentally assassinated Archduke Alexander Kapranos when the spoon he was wielding turned out to be loaded. In 1920, he served as Ambassador to Omigodtheykilledkenny, and due to his stirling efforts to bring the two countries together, and the fact he actually didn't end up going to war with them. Replaced Sir Leslie Featherstonehaugh-Mickelwhaite-Cholmondsey-Cholmondsey-Smythe, KCRC as UN representative in 1930
Politics: Strong sovereigntist except on issues of Free Trade
Responsibilities within the UN Office: Has plenipotentiary power, and thus it is he who has full responsibility for the Cobdenian votes.
Interests: International Diplomacy, shipping regulations
The Deputy Cobdenian Permanent Representative to the United Nations
Sir Miles Lamiman Johnson-Wutchwyff, KCRC
</div>Age: 32
Birthplace: Brighton, UK
Family: Married, two children
Education: St. Lucifers College, Oxford
Employment: Home Office, before being transferred to the Foreign and Regional Office in 1930, and was appointed Sir Cyril's deputy in 1932
Background: Parents were wealthy industrialists, who moved Emigrated to Cobdenia in 1922 in order to expand their business and to find better weather
Politics: Conservative
Responsibilities within the UN Office: Largely concerned with running the administrative side of the mission, acting as human resources manager, accountant, and other similar roles
Interests: Mute Newt farming
Defence Attache
Major-General Sir Brian Alexander Montgomery Haig "Pointy" Blatherstock, KOG, CRC, CGO (retired)
</div>Age: 65
Birthplace: North Holden, Buckinghamshire
Family: Too complicated to explain here. See Brian Blatherstock
Education: Hornby College, Sussex, RMC Sandhurst
Employment: British Army Royal East Kent Regiment 1893-1904 served, South Africa 1879, Chitral, Relief of Kimberley, Paardeberg, South Africa 1900-02 reaching rank of of Major; British-Indian Army 39th Garhwal Rifles 1904-1919, served in Punjab Frontier, Bassée 1914, Armentières 1914, Festubert 1914 '15, Neuve Chapelle, Aubers, France and Flanders 1914-15, Egypt 1915-16, Khan Baghdadi, Sharqat, Mesopotamia 1917-18, Macedonia 1918 reaching rank of Major; British-Cobdenian Army South N Sussex Regiment 1919-1922, reaching rank of Lt-Colonel; British-Cobdenian/Cobdenian Army General Staff of the War Department 1922-1930 reaching current rank of Major-General; Retired 1930 following balloon accident, making him "Possibly the stupidest man ever to wear a uniform" according to the late Governor-General
Background: Wealthy family; father was a Captain in the Royal Navy. Aquired the nickname "Pointy" after his habit of pointing to places on battlefields without actually giving any orders
Politics: Was very militarian, now considered to care only about instant food and accesorising
Responsibilities within the UN Office: Theoretically, advising Sir Cyril in matters concerning security. In practice, hiding in his office with a Lee-Enfield rifle
Interests: Pot Noodles
Legal Advisor
The Honourable Sir Barrington Womble
- Main article(s): Sir Barrington Womble
</div>
Age: 72
Birthplace: Port Sir Richard, Cobdenia
Family: Married, two children, five grandchildren
Education: Sir Richard Cobden School for Boys, University of Keynestown
Employment: Barrister and by 1915 he had become a Judge, and an adviser to the Prime Minister in international law. In 1923, he was elected to the High Chamber of Justice. In 1929 he retired, and returned to being a appeal court Judge. He accepted the Prime Minister and Governors nomination to become the delegate to the Pretenama Panel in late 1929. Left the Pretenama Panel and became the Cobdenian legal advisor to the UN
Background: Parents were famous entrepreneurs, involved in building the Cobdenian Railways, amongst other things
Politics: Above it
Responsibilities within the UN Office: Examining the legality of resolutions, clearing up language, suggesting loopholes to exploit
Interests: Law
Economic Attache
Mr Hercules Grytpype-Thynne
</div>Age: Unknown
Birthplace: London, UK
Family: Single
Education: School of Lifemanship
Employment: Very shady past. Known to have been involved in the following: Planning to sell the guided NAAFI secrets to the Russians, booby-trapping the boots of the Hungarian Football team, and the disappearance of the crew of the Marie Celest, Has also worked as a Police Inspector in Bexhill, the butler to the British Prime Minister, and as a conman.
Background: Serial conman and embezzler, also a master blackmailer
Politics: Conservative
Responsibilities within the UN Office: Embezzlement and blackmail
Interests: Furthering his own financial interests
Secretary to Permanent Representative
Miss Caroline Anne Heisenberg-Little
</div>Age: 25
Birthplace: New Hailsham, Cobdenia
Family: Single, having an affair with Sir Cyril
Education: Riccardoton Girl's School
Employment: Joined the Cobdenian Foreign and Regional Office in 1927, and been serving with Sir Cyril ever since
Background: Middle class parents
Politics: Actually, a liberal, but never shares
Responsibilities within the UN Office: Paperwork
Interests: Sir Cyril. Apparently, he's got a stonka
Secretary to Deputy Permanent Representative
Miss. Claudia Ingebritsen
</div>Age: 23
Birthplace: Oslo, Norway
Family: Single, having an affair with Sir Cyril
Education: Riccardoton School
Employment: Formerly the secretary to Sir Rory Relp, joined the FRO in 1930 and sent to act as Sir Miles' secretary
Background: Working class, father a coal miner. Emigrated to Cobdenia by tramp steamer in 1929.
Politics: Borderline Communist
Responsibilities within the UN Office: Paperwork
Interests: The revolution
Assistant to Mr Grytpype-Thynne
Count Jim "Thighs" Moriarty
</div>Age: Older side of indeterminable
Birthplace: Supposedly France, somewhere
Family: None
Education: None
Employment: Known to have worked with Mr Grytpype-Thynne for some time, usually as his lacky or whipping boy, and as such has the same shady past as his superior. Claims to have played the male lead in over 50 postcards, acted as the Minister without underpants to the Principality of Monte Carlo, and the world barbed-wire hurdling champion until his unfortunate accident. None of which are verified
Background: Unknown; possibly Impoverished French Aristocratic
Politics: Anti-French Revolution
Responsibilities within the UN Office: God knows.
Interests: Money
Receptionist
Miss Aiswari Banerjee
</div>Age: 28
Birthplace: Riccardoton, Cobdenia
Family: Single
Education: Riccardoton Girls School
Employment: No previous employment
Background: Father is the Maharaja of Carnaphistan, one of the more pro-British tribes in Cobdenia
Politics: Conservative
Responsibilities within the UN Office: Receptionist stuff
Interests: Cobdenia's cultural heritage
Floor Plan
Key
A: Coding Room (access only to Sir Cyril)
B: Strong Room (access only to Sir Cyril)
C: Sir Miles' Outer Office
D: Sir Cyril's Outer Office
E: Sir Cyril's Private Bathroom
F: Supplies Closet
G: Janitorial Closet
H: Communications Room
I: Gentlemen's Bathroom
J: Ladies Bathroom
NOTE: The Office of the Economic Attache and his assistant is on the 21st floor, in a disused ladies bathroom stall