B.November 16th 1650

D.November 16th 1730

Early Life

Born November 16th 1650 Wang’Bawt was the itinerant and slightly mad younger brother of Matsuo Bashō, the renowned Japanese haiku poet. Often looked down upon as the younger brother of Bashō and a crazy one at that, Wang’Bawt didn’t receive nearly as much respect as one might think he would have. In 1689, he came across the Ainu Discordian commune on the island of Hokkaido. It was there he learned of Eris and learned to consult his pineal gland, to amazing success. The goddess liked him. For over 15 years, he wandered the land preaching of the goddess, often to no success (everybody thought he was out of his mind, which honestly he was). Finally in 1704, he declared, roughly translated, “to hell with all of you, I’m a goin’ that-a-way!” He faked his own death and departed with his wife and 24 children to Erisiya Montanya, marked down on a map for him by the Ainu Discordians. No one noticed.

Later Life

Upon his arrival at Port Kallisti in 1705, he set out to make a new life for himself and his family. He moved up to central Erisiya Montanya, building a home about a third of the way up Mt. Vostok (still there to this day, the Wang’Bawt compound is a popular tourist destination for those visiting the city of Vostok and is also an important Discordian shrine). He was quickly noticed by the townspeople of Vostok and was declared a prophet of Eris, for he consulted his pineal gland often and to incredible success. One by one his children grew up and departed his home upon the mountain, often against their will. By the time of his death in 1730, Wang’Bawt had made thousands of pronouncements, only 50 of which are intelligible. It is believed by Erisiyans that he sits in heaven at the feet of the Buddha, feeding him mince pies.