The Pazhujeb Islands
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| Flag of Pazhujeb Islands | |
| Motto: Bandar ka jaaneretam adark k'aousad | |
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| Region | Hyrule |
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| Capital | Evir |
| Official Language(s) | Pazhujebi (official), Yoruba, English |
| Government | Socialist democracy |
| Population | 7 million |
| Currency | Pazhujebi riyal |
| NS Sunset XML | |
The Country
The Jingoistic States of the Pazhujeb Islands is a tiny island nation in the Atlantic several hundred miles off the coast of west Africa. The nation is notable for having been closed off to the outside world from 269 to 1926 AD. The islands had never been occupied by any except its occupants and by occasional Yoruban invasion forces, but had never been noticed by European cartographers until it was accidentally run across in the 20th century. The country's population are found to have been mostly genetically descended from North Indian peoples. There are various explanations for this bizarre phenomenon, however, native legend and leading Roman historian Frederick Büchel agree on one key explanation; read the historical summary below for more details.
The Pazhujebi people are known for being frustrating at the best of times, and militant at the worst. They are vehemently protective of their independence, and have in the main refused to adapt to modern society or technology (although they have in recent years latched onto several modern conveniences that have piqued their interest, such as modern literature, world football, and private toilets).
History
When Augustus I conquered Egypt in 1 AD, India's major trade partner in the West came under the control of the Roman Empire. Though trade at first was enormous, and very profitable for both sides, over the next two centuries the balance of equality in the trade agreement increasingly began to shift more in favor of the Indians. The exact reasons for this are unclear; but most theories center around Roman decadence only increasing even as their empire was declining.
At any rate, the vast wealth that Indians were making off of the Roman empire gave them the opportunity to spread out in the world. By the year 200 AD, over 1 million people of Indian descent resided within the range of the Roman Empire. Though they remained very protective of their native culture, and most continued to speak either Sanskrit or other native Indian tongues, some truly settled into life as Roman citizens, learning Latin and becoming entrepreneurs or soldiers.
What happened in the year 269 has not been well documented, and what native Pazhujebis allege happened is not even remotely backed up by the discoveries of modern Roman historians. However, according to Pazhujebi historians (most notably the historian Ndubuj) in 269 AD the emperor Claudius II failed to defend the city of Athens from the Heruli (northern European invaders), and frustration among the Roman people at the disrepair of their great empire reached a zenith. Though the previous sentence's events are backed up by Western historians, the allegation that this frustration took the form of a mass deportation of the Indian population is still under massive debate. Many Roman historians allege that it never happened, where as Pazhujebi historians (and leading German historian Frederick Büchel) are adamant that it did.
In any case, what is known is that by the end of 269, the population of Roman citizens of Indian descent fell abruptly to zero. The Pazhujebi account is a reasonable explanation for this exodus: Claudius issued a decree (which is by Western accounts undocumented) ordering that all people of Indian descent be either killed or taken forcefully to the western coast of Spain and shoved off in poorly constructed boats. 700,000 Indians left from the coast. It is completely unexplained how 200,000 of them found their way to the isles several hundred miles off the coast of West Africa; but what is known is that most of the citizens who were deported off the coast of Spain in those flimsy boats died at sea.
Some geologists suggest that there may have been a radical but temporary shift in the Atlantic Ocean's current, such that rather than being carried north towards the British Isles, the refugees instead floated hundreds of miles straight west, and were then snatched by the cold current on the far side of the ocean (tantalizingly close to the American coastline) and propelled back towards Africa. If this were to happen it would surely have had to take place during the winter months, which matches with Pazhujebi history.
In any case, Western historians and cartographers knew nothing of the islands until 1926, when they were tripped across by a British military vessel en route to South Africa. In that empty nearly two-millenia-spanning period, the Pazhujeb Islands' society and culture remained remarkably unchanged. Having arrived at the islands, these former Indians built a new culture, though they were obviously (literally) beginning from rock bottom. Reflecting in some ways the culture of India that they had not forgotten, and resembling in others the Roman culture they had adopted, Pazhujebi society revolved exclusively around democracy.
The flag, which allegedly had been developed long before it was officially hoisted in 1955, is a perfect example of this dichotomy. Though some assume that the unique purple of the country's flag comes from respect for the Roman emperor, this assumption is incorrect; in ancient Indian culture, the color purple was synonymous with mourning. The first Pazhujebis never wanted their descendants to forget the horrors of their terrible journey. However, they did not reject positivity: in the right hand corner of the flag is the symbol for the Roman god Jupiter, the most powerful and grand of all the Roman gods. This brings into clear focus the enormous pride of the Pazhujebi people, even after having been so terribly persecuted.
However, simply because Western historians knew nothing of islands does not mean that other peoples were not aware. In fact, Yorubas from the coast of Africa apparently did know of the islands, and mounted various attempted invasions around the 10th and 11th centuries AD. This is presumably where the tendency of Pazhujebis to be exceedingly militant allegedly began; the invasions were voraciously repelled by the Pazhujebis, whose knowledge of Roman warfare gave them a distinct advantage.
Though the invasions failed, many Africans who landed on the islands were ultimately allowed to stay, mostly because the Pazhujeb Islands are quite remote from the coast (Ascension Island is closer than the African coast actually is). This influx of Yoruba culture added yet another color to the rainbow of Pazhujebi society, the most notable being the native African faiths. These religious traditions were, incidentally, the ancestors of modern voodoo practices, and so this is why the most prevalent religion on the Pazhujeb Islands is known as Pazhujebi voodoo.
