Kuampala
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"Socialisme, Démocratie, Anticommunisme, Négritude" | |||||
Map | |||||
Languages - Official - Unofficial |
Kuampalese, French, English, Lingala, and Swahili More than 80 tribal languages & regional dialects | ||||
Capital | Musongaville | ||||
President | Colonel Moibuto "Scotty Doc" Musonga | ||||
Prime Minister | Dominique Ngbanda | ||||
Area - Total - % water |
5,543,014 km² 8.6% water | ||||
Population - Total (2006) |
127,000,000 | ||||
National holiday | 12 November 1965 (Scotty Doc's birthday) | ||||
Government type | Presidential republic | ||||
Nation type | Socialist dictatorship | ||||
National animal English name |
Panthera pardus Leopard | ||||
GDP - Total (USD) - GDP/capita (USD) |
$664,984,167,393.75 $5,236.10 | ||||
Currency - Exchange rate |
Torch of Hope 3.2074 Torches of Hope = $1 USD | ||||
Time Zone | CET, EET (UTC+1 to +2)
not observed (UTC+1 to +2) | ||||
National Anthem | Nkosi Sikelel' iAfrika | ||||
Internet TLD | .ku | ||||
Calling Code | +243 |
Kuampala is an enormous Central African nation of immense cultural and geographical diversity, ranging from impenetrable tepid rainforest to rolling savannahs to shimmering waterfalls to barren deserts, all inhabited by over 250 different tribes. Kuampala is made up of the former nations of Congo-Kinshasa, Congo-Brazzaville, Gabon, Central African Republic, Uganda, Rwanda, Burundi, and portions of Cameroon, southern Sudan, and western Kenya. Kuampala has been ruled since its inception by President-for-Life Colonel Moibuto "Scotty Doc" Musonga, a ruthless, brutal, authoritarian, and wise dictator.
Politics
Kuampala is ruled by a unicameral National Assembly known as the Supreme Provisional Revolutionary Council. It is headed by a Prime Minister, who is merely a figurehead and serves only to rubber-stamp the decisions of the President, who wields absolute control over every aspect of the country. The Kuampalese government officially follows an ideology combining socialism, militant anti-Communism, négritude, traditional cultural values, and extreme nationalism. As previously stated, Kuampala is totally controlled by the President, who also has a massive personality cult. His photograph adorns every billboard, every public place, most private homes, and even places of worship. Former residences of his are regarded as national pilgrimage sites of almost religious importance, like Mecca is to Muslims. His quotes appear on the front page of every newspaper, his picture is on all school textbooks, and priests are coerced into telling their followers that the President is the Messiah. Most Kuampalese believe the President is an immortal deity with supernatural powers, who can summon evil spirits to punish dissenters. Only one political party is legal, the Progressive Revolutionary Social Front (PRSF), which follows no particular ideology (it is described as "neither left, right, nor center"). Membership is mandatory, and every person, from the moment of their birth, is automatically a member. Elections are held every 5 years, in which people can choose government-approved candidates by checking "yes" or "no." Ballot stuffing, electoral fraud, vote rigging, multiple voting by party militants, and illegal voting by those too young to vote, all ensure that each candidate is overwhelmingly elected by 99.9% or greater "yes."
Economy
Kuampala is a very poor country. Though geologically it is one of the wealthiest countries ever, all-pervasive government corruption, unsound economic policies, and low worker productivity stifle the economy, which has been stagnant and backwards for years. Widespread food shortages, high unemployment, and hyperinflation have devastated the economy for years.
Foreign Policy
Kuampala is a member of the World Anti-Communist League and a strong supporter of Roach-Busters and The Parthians. Scotty Doc, although anti-capitalist, is friendly to capitalist countries. He strongly hates communism, and will allow no communist embassies in Kuampala. He provides money and arms to anticommunist governments and rebels around the world.