Difference between revisions of "Alasdair I Frosticus"

Revision as of 00:48, 25 October 2005

Alasdair I Frosticus

Flag of Alasdair I Frosticus
Motto: Be of your frostiness, not with your frostiness
Mapping a dreamed nation is at best difficult
Region	The Dreamed Realm
Capital	Alasdairopolis
Official Language(s)	unknown - all languages are automatically translated in the Dreamed Realm
Leader	Alasdair I Frosticus
Population	>1 billion
Currency	nomismata
NS Sunset XML

Few details are known of The Holy and Puissant Empire of Alasdair I Frosticus, a nation which exists on a dream plane capable of intersecting with reality as we know it, and ruled by its namesake Emperor (or Basileus). The country remains famous mainly for having hosted World Cup 2, the second installment of the enduring football World Cup.

The nation is apparently continually dreamed into existence by the meditating monks of the Imperial Monastery of Haghia Sophia in the capital city of Alasdairopolis. It is rumoured that should the monks be woken, the entire nation would crash out of the dreamworld, killing untold millions. The nation consists of a fertile coastal plain, where most of the population live, and an arid highland called the 'chaco' - where a disproportionate percentage of its football stars came from in the days of the Empire's sporting activity. Politically, Alasdair I Frosticus combines elements of Byzantine-inspired Orthodox theocracy with the efficiency of Paraguay.

After the early period of activity that saw the Holy Empire host the World Cup, the nation withdrew itself from contact with ordinary physical reality for many years after His Imperial Majesty decided that the corruption of the physical world was detrimental to the ongoing serenity of his people. The dreaming monks severed the link between the altered existence of the dream plane and the physical world, and the Holy Empire appeared to fade from contact with ordinary time and space.

Recently, however, there are reports that the reclusive nation has revived contact with the ordinary world. An obscure nation known only as The Archregimancy is rumoured to be a gateway through which reality and the Dreamed Realm can intersect. It is said that if travellers can in fact reach the Archregimancy, they may be able to find a portal that will lead them to the Holy Empire.

These rumours, however, remain unsubstantiated.

Credence was recently given to these rumours by the shock announcement that a Holy Empire squad would enter World Cup 25 in honour of the tournament's silver jubilee. The Imperials duly played a friendly against World Cup 1 hosts Ariddia, winning 6-2 in an exhilirating display of Frosty Football. Unfortunately, the nation's lack of exposure to ordinary reality led to the team being infected with a fairly ordinary flu virus which, due to the lack of built-in disease resistance, soon turned into a virulent plague. Tens of thousands - including all but one member of the party that travelled to Ariddia - died before the disease was brought under control by the Dreaming Monks.

This incident further strengthened the Basileus' resolve to have as little to do with ordinary physical reality, and stringent quarantine measures were put in place. A hastily cobbled together replacement squad was still allowed to enter World Cup 25, but was forced to play its home games in the Archregimancy.

Just about the only surviving historical record relating to the first phase of the Holy Empire's contact with physical reality (other than the World Cup) regards the victory of the Prince Imperial in an international poetry competition. The original report follows:

THE HOLY EMPIRE TIMES

PRINCE IMPERIAL WINS INTERNATIONAL POETRY COMPETITION!

Basileus said to be proud.

By Theodore Ducaso, Court Correspondent, Alasdairopolis

The Prince Imperial has won the People's Republic of Love Poetry's poetry competition with a love sonnet rather unimaginatively titled Love Sonnet:

I cannot live, though thou might love me not,

Without the sight of thy bright sun-cast face.

And all the crimes of man are long forgot

When I am bound within thy shining grace.

Why dost thou spurn my freely offered hand

And cast aside my heart as if w'out care

When we together might yet see all lands

United as if you shone everywhere.

Without you all is darkness without light

Come with me then, that we might shine anew,

Emboldened by your sun that stands so bright

And bid all other lovers sweet adieu.

Illume my path with love that I might know

The ways that I might see thy beauty grow.

"I don't care if it is the worst title for a sonnet since Shakespeare was naming his sonnets 'XIV' and 'LIII', I'm still happy to have won the competition" said the Prince. "Now maybe I can get my beloved Zoe Carbonopsina to notice me!"

At this point, the Prince threatened to burst into song, and the press conference was abrubtly terminated by a rioting press who remembered all too well the Prince's renditions of his less impressive past efforts such as 'I love her like a cute little lovelorn puppy would', 'Luvvie-wuvvie-fuvvie', and 'You make me go all soft and gooey inside'.

The Basileus is said to be proud of his nephew, and hopes that his victory in the competition will temporarily put a halt to the Prince's moping about over his unrequited affections.