Raging Penguins
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| Flag of Raging Penguins | |
| Motto: SquaaaaarrrrrgggghhhhhhhK!!! | |
| No Map Available Yet | |
| Region | Lancre |
|---|---|
| Capital | Bloko'yce |
| Official Language(s) | Ferrous |
| Leader | Phether Tuks |
| Population | 2,007,000,000 |
| Currency | Curse |
| NS Sunset XML | |
Contents
National Situation
The small, strange Dutchy of Raging Penguins is a nation dominated by angry telemarketers, nutty politicians, and an unconcerned Dictator. A land of ice, rock, and icy rocks, Raging Penguins' main tourist attraction is the Autumn Anger Festivale, which is held so that furious bankers can beat lawyers over the heads with briefcases, and discontented farmers can vent their spleen on construction workers via pitchforks, and so that once the general populace has released its anger and frustration, the army can carpet-bomb the whole thing in a spectacular pyrotechnics display that no world-traveller should miss. The nation is heavily polluted, and its untrained attempts at a nuclear program have caused strange mutant species to spring up, including intelligent Molds and fungi, squirrels with four or five tails, two or three superheros, and the commercially exploited, caveman-like, Troglodytes.
International Affairs
Raging Penguins does involve itself internationally, mostly when other nations complain about its habit of dumping nuclear waste in its neighbors farmlands. It also has a government-funded Raging Penguins Football team, which it tries not to fund too much. The team, enourmously unpopular in Raging Penguins, is made up of lunatics(mostly), and has a pack of seven Raging Penguins(the national animal) as its mascot. Its fanbase is made up of four logs, and its stadium, an empty stretch of ground which used to be home to a gallows, has an attendance record of a staggering -400 people per game.
Lately the governement has been entering the team into the notoriously dangerous Lancre Cup, in the hopes that they will all die, and what minimal funding is given to the team - as well as their federal paychecks - can instead be poured into the Militaries dream of changing the military's standard weapon(traditional wooden spears) into something more modern(cheap AK-47's).
The nation has recently declared its unerring(and unreliable) loyalty to its large, militaristic neighbor Dregruk, making it a Protectorate of the Dregruk Empire. When asked why this decision was made, the President responded that it had seemed like a good idea, and that he'd had nothing more exciting to do at the time. The implications of such an abrupt political change appear to be lost on him, although it occurs to many that Raging Penguins is hardly a place one would want to protect.
It is also speculated that Raging Penguins has some mysterious, unexplainable connection with The Warrior Peoples of Milchama, although this is only silly speculation, and is clearly wrong, despite both nation's mutual trust and distrust. Milchama's people tend to be wary of The Not-So-Grand Dutchy's people, while the Penguinian people see the Warrior People's as being borderline Foriegn. However, both nations are highly interested in one anothers affairs, and are often sending one another help during their respective campaigns.
National Identity
The Grand Dutchy is famous for many things, like its apathy, its unapolegetic hatred of its own people, and its complete lack of reason. The populace prides itself for the general dislike of anything percieved as "foriegn"(a word which has become derogatory there), but is often simply culturally diverse. Most visitors to Raging Penguins live in places with cultures somewhat similar to the Dutchy's, and are accepted as "non-for'n" people. People wearing headscarves, robes, funny hats, or bowties are regarded as unsafe and unwelcome.
However, many tourists still come to Raging Penguins to see the great attractions like the Autumn Anger Festival, the Great Twenty-Toed Toad Race, or the annual National Grenade-Toss-Game Tournament. Another typpe of tourist - the Political Observer - comes to observe to intricate workings of Raging Penguins' parliment, the Pub of Representitives - an amazing display of Formal Debate, Sensible Reasoning, and General Drunkeness among Politicians.
Government
Nobody knows how the government is run, least of all The Man in charge of it all, Phether Tuks. Nobody even knows how Mr. Tuks gained office in the first place, although some say that he accidentally wandered into the President's office while trying to peddle hotdogs, and never left the leather recliner.
More Information?
For more information about Raging Penguins(something which nobody in their right mind would want), you can - but shouldn't - go to The Raging Penguin Post, the governments' underground, illegal, and widely read newspaper. You can find this lamentable piece of trashy literature at this location.
