Difference between revisions of "Zwangzug"

Revision as of 07:46, 24 May 2007

Zwangzug

Flag of Zwangzug
Motto: We pawn n00bs
National Anthem: Anthem
Region	Starways Congress
Capital	Constantinople (ruins of)
Largest city	Merano
Official Language(s)	English (de facto)
Leader	Ember Nickel
Population	approximately 1,200,000,000
Currency	check (ZZCH)
Internet TLD	.zz
Calling code	+64
ISO Code	ZZSC
NS Sunset XML

The Rookdom of Zwangzug is a Liberal Democratic Socialist nation. Founder of Starways Congress, it was formerly in the West Pacific.

Geography

Physical

The predominant geographical feature of Zwangzug is a mountain range running northeast to southwest in the east of the country, they themselves are not populated except by a few small religious groups and DU. A certain altitude is known as the "Waste Line" because of the rugged terrain: almost nothing is higher than that. The exception is the training grounds for the national football team.

To the west of these mountains, the land is much warmer, with lush rainforests. The nation's agriculture (rice is a major crop) is grown in this area. The current inhabitants of the rainforests are believed to be the most direct descendants of the country's first humans. While these indigenous peoples have only recently interacted with the more technological citizens, many of their youth are eager to learn English and teach their own language, which shares some etymology with Hindī-Urdū. Contrary to early fears, the rainforest denizens have not been oppressed by later settlers. The ploy of Sameep "chief Dances-with-Zebras" Trier to make such claims in an effort to convince governmental authorities to grant him a casino has been denied by tribal leaders, and only shows that they are as cunningly intellectual as any other Zwangzugian.

Most of the country's landmass, however, lies to the east of the mountains. It is significantly colder here: temperatures average around 8 degrees Celsius (47 Fahrenheit) year-round. The fairly temperate climate features considerable amounts of snow, especially in the north and closer to the mountains. Wind from the Deep Blue Lake also plays havoc with the weather of the Artificial Intelligence University.

Political

Just east of the mountains is Merano, the most populated city of Zwangzug. Though its residents are proud of their city, they're surprisingly apathetic when it comes to national allegiance. Merano borders its twin city of Bangkok, an altogether different sort of city. Though it rivals Merano in size, it's plagued by crime and a seedy reputation.

Governmental functions are carried out in the Ziggurat, a structure farther east in the ruins of Constantinople.

Culture

Music

Music is widely appreciated throughout Zwangzug. Its national anthem is, appropriately, Anthem by Tim Rice, Björn Ulvaeus and Benny Andersson, though some advocate for a "meta-anthem", especially when representing the country at sporting events. Other popular music is that of Red Knight and Benny Angle.

Language

English is the de facto official language of Zwangzug, though there is much good-natured controversy between two dialects: "descriptive" (verbose) and "algebraic" (compact) speakers, or notators.

One difficulty is the terminology for residents of the country. Descriptive notators generally accept "Zwangzugian", though pronunciation is difficult. Algebraic notators prefer "peons".

Religion

Zwangzug is a secular state, and religion is not discussed on public land. The majority of residents are nonreligious, but some follow Ketrianism (a religion practiced nowhere else), and there is even a Christian minority. It celebrates on the Holy Day of Our Lord the Sacrificial: the name of this holiday is the reason there are no algebraic Christians.

Holidays

Zwangzug follows the Gregorian calendar, though it reckons years from a different starting point (its year zero is 512 CE). Its two major holidays are April 4 (Intellectual Freedom Day) and October 19 (Establishment Day).

Media

The internet serves as the main media source for Zwangzug: its TLD is .zz. However, there are still other outlets, such as the single television channel Zwangzug Broadcasting.

Newspapers

The printed word is pervasive, but on the wane. Zwangzug's two main newspapers are the Merano Regency (descriptive) and the Bangkok Scoresheet (algebraic). Out of respect for trees and mounting expense, a third newspaper recently switched to all-online publication. Taking a prefix to denote that, it is now known as the e-Lipogram.

Sports

The people of Zwangzug will be first to assert that sports transcend athletics. However, the Zwangzug Athletics Organization does coordinate the country's athletic programs.

Foreign Relations

Claiming uninterest in obeying others' decisions, Zwangzug refuses to join the United Nations. This list of ambassadors is given in the order that diplomatic relationships were established.

The country's attitude towards Plutoni is one of general amusement.

History

The most popular myth surrounding the country's history states that shortly before the founding of Zwangzug, a despot somewhere else, for whatever reason, greatly desired inordinate amounts of rice. Peasants, fleeing at his wrath, set up organizational areas for farming. The king realized the error of his ways, and that land went on living in peace. But those who had already settled in what is now Zwangzug stayed there, and it gained its sovereignty soon later. A real national identity, however, did not develop until after The War of the Wall that Wasn't.

Government

The country is divided into administrative districts: theoretically, there are sixty-four, but the surveyors seem to have been mischievous, fuddled, or lazy. Each has limited power to set its own laws, but their main responsibility is to provide an elected representative to a lawmaking body. Anyone over the age of sixteen and with "sufficient reasoning capacity" (a relatively high standard, as the country is intellectually arrogant) is allowed to vote. National elections are held for a composite minister (currently Ember Nickel), whose function is theoretically to break ties in the Parliament. Since they happen daily, it is a powerful position indeed.

The country's pretitle, "Rookdom", may seem odd out of context. While it does not directly refer to a specific person, general attitude believes that it represents the notion of government by the intellectual, while upholding democracy over monarchy. The first leader of the country, preceding organized elections by almost one and a half millennia, is believed to have represented this ideal: legend has it that he was a wise advisor to the tyrant whose refugees founded the country. (Other versions of the legend have it that he was the one responsible for the demand for rice in the first place.)

For more information, see the List of political parties in Zwangzug.

Economy

Zwangzug is predominantly socialist. However, the government believes that media especially should be kept free of governmental influence, and as such has the unenviable if not paradoxical position of providing subsidies to all outlets, including those such as the Underground Element, a radio station actively critiquing of governmental policies. Its "Anti-Government Hour" (64 minutes) features such messages as "Capitalism doesn't kill! Well, most of the time anyhow. And certainly not more than socialism.".

Transportation

A light rail network connects many major cities. Foreign travel is made possible by Isolani Airlines.