Zwangzug national football team

The Zwangzug national football team began international competition in the Baptism of Fire for World Cup 33. Consisting of "whoever shows up" (athletics are not priorities in Zwangzug), and theoretically overseen by the Zwangzug Football Association (of which it has half the authority), it practices above the Waste Line in the Tirolean Mountains. Due to training in the high altitude, the players have high endurance at relatively high-oxygenated stadia closer to sea level.

Stylistically, the team usually plays a defensive 3-4-3. Though this could be seen as oxymoronic by other countries, the team believes it to be a moderate formation, with as many forwards as defenders.

Starting Roster

Statistics are through World Cup 33 qualifiers.

Forwards

• #4, Philip Stings. Originally from Bangkok: grew up on the streets. Small. Fiesty. Dangerous. 10 career goals.
• #12, Yul Maughum. Also originally from Bangkok: has "ties" to people in power. Large. 6 career goals.
• #1, Simon Ryne Olson. From Merano. Show-off, arrogant...but he has the talent to back it up. 16 career goals.

Midfielders

• #31, Ulysses Stael. Older brother of Steven Ruck. One of the older players on the team, having had a long and talented career.
• #13, Steven Ruck. Younger brother of Ulysses Stael: constantly feels like he's in the other's shadow, though a talented player in his own right. He changed his name to try and stand on his own: now, the brothers have an uneasy truce on the field but don't communicate off it.
• #54, Jacob Barons. Ketrian: unfortunately, few see much beyond that. 1 career goal.
• #50, Roger Hammers. From Merano. Usually in the center right-left as well as forward-back.

Defenders

• #46, Andrew Card. Moody. "Strategic rule-breaker." 1 career goal.
• #69, Lawrence Sevvy. Known for his off-the-field affairs more than anything else. Dislikes BOB more than most.
• #27, Rube Tercer. The team captain. Strategically minded, comes up with creative formations BOB often overlooks.

Goalkeeper

• #42, Anatoly Trumper. Absentminded. Not exceptionally athletic either. But a stereotypical guy with lots of heart.

Other personnel

Substitute

Anne Onymous, who wears all the untaken integers from 1 to 99. Equally versatile as a forward, midfielder, or defender, and able to play in multiple incarnations.

Coach

BOB 64, a product of the Artificial Intelligence University. "BOB" is sometimes jokingly said to stand for "Bought Out By" (presumably the number 64, as advertisements are forbidden in the country). An emotionless computer, unpopular among most of the team. An accompanying techie assists it when the nature of fractal reality interferes with wireless communication.

Media

Alan Babbage and Charles Turing cover the team for Zwangzug Broadcasting. A saxophonist also travels with the team to perform Zwangzug's Anthem. While all three of the country's leading newspapers cover it, they do not have correspondents with the team: there is little financial support from the government, also evidenced by the fact that the players must sleep two to a room.

Colors

The home jerseys for the Zwangzug team are white with black stripes. The away jerseys are black with white stripes. The goalkeeper's jersey has a multicolored fractal pattern.

Performance by event

• Baptism of Fire 20: 1-0-5 in group play, eliminated in regional semifinals
• World Cup 33 qualifiers: 9-4-5 in group play