Fritz Conway

Fritz Conway
Nation Omigodtheykilledkenny / Tiki Taki Title OMGTKK ambassador to Lady Deathstrike Age 20 Once said "All dem bitches in da club, no dun what dey shoody, freak up ginst mi woody, make me wanna scream gimme gimme!" --on Karmicaria, Cluichstan and Retired WerePenguins' sudden departure from Antarctic Paradise

Fritz Conway is the Kennyite ambassador to Lady Deathstrike. The first Tiki Taki native to serve the Federal Republic in an ambassadorial role (though he is a native Kennyite citizen), Conway was dispatched to Deathstrike's Necrom City in an attempt to improve relations with Antarctic nations from outside OMGTKK's home region.

Born in Tiki Taki in 1986 to a native father and a Kennyite mother, Conway has spent most of his life traveling back and forth between his native island and OMGTKK's Chocolate Salty Islands. Though he considers himself mostly Tiki Taki, he speaks (wholly unintelligible) English, and since the Federal Republic's 2005 invasion of his homeland, he has proven quite adept at introducing Kennyite customs to his indigenous brethren, namely jacking pricy cars and breaking into strangers' homes when he needs a place to crash for the night or to plug some random Kennyite white girl visiting the island. The State Department eventually decided to "award" this "cultural stewardship" by appointing Conway envoy to some far-off hellhole -- though his service in Lady Deathstrike is officially listed as "community service" to work off multiple arrests for burglary and grand theft auto. President Manuelo Fernanda also informed Deathstrike President Mira Conor that as a true-blood Islander Conway would feel right at home in the Deathstriker version of "Paradise."

Relishing the opportunity to steal shit and break into nice homes in another nation, Conway heads OMGTKK's first Antarctic embassy outside Antarctic Oasis. He's also unofficially charged with most matters pertaining to Kennyite relations with the Antarctic Paradise region at large. And even though with his Islander accent no one ever understands what the hell he's saying, most are wise simply to smile and nod politely. It's just good diplomacy.

Additional Material

• President Fernanda's notice to President Conor re: Conway
• Polar Picayune article on Lady Deathstrike/OMGTKK relations